My life is exquisitely difficult to talk about. It’s woven with extreme themes – sexual abuse, mind control, aliens, mysticism – and with accomplishments that make me shy, and failures that embarrass me, and critical facts that embarrass other people.
And none of the themes, for simplification, can be hidden or glossed over, because each intertwines and sometimes explains the others.
I can’t begin at the beginning, because it is either boring, or if I tell certain details, it sounds too woo-woo.
Since I almost always get interrupted fairly early with the question, “Why you?”I think I’ll begin there.
It could be any number of things, but is probably all of them together. Plus the fact that I won “the lottery.”
(Remember that classic, creepy short story, “The Lottery”? We read it once in grade school and again in high school, about a community that killed one person every year by stoning, a person drawn by lottery.)
My lottery ticket to this crazy life may have been as simple as my birth date. I was born on a Full Moon, on a Monday (Moon Day), in the middle of Cancer, also known as Moon Child.
And it wasn’t just a Full Moon, somewhere inside that 24-hour window; no, I was born 8 minutes before the Full Moon, 8/(24×60) = 5/1,000ths of a degree of perfection. Moon energy was strong. (Astronomical charts, not astrological, show the coincidence.)
So were the numbers: I was born on July 7, 1952 − 5+2 adding up to 7. Three sevens. Then my mother gave me a name with 7 letters: Jean Ann.
My last name, at birth and now, is Eisenhower. My father was second cousin to Dwight, who was nominated to the Republic ticket for President of the United States later on the day of my birth. The next day, the local paper would give my birth a short column to remark on the coincidence.
Maybe all these coincidences explain my winning/losing lottery ticket. Or maybe mind control was already in the family.
Eisenhower family crest
[I’ll expand on these later: Eisenhowers = Iron hewers (secret society protecting metallurgy secrets for the king). Grandfather Hollywood veterinarian of Rin-Tin-Tin – Mason – money lender. Father Navy CASU 33 – unsolved mystery.
[Petersens – Mormons. Grandmother with her handler. Mother I saw switch alters, in trance. Unexplained terror re Mormons. Flashback of babyhood ritual.]
I seem to have won/lost the lottery and was treated to MK. Then, having developed a bad attitude toward our culture due to MK, I joined the counter-culture and offended my handlers – again and again, beginning with rejecting the invitation of another secret society, calling them “plastic,” accepting their invitation to “try them,” taking the vows, and then de-activating and breaking my vows. I assume my actions resulted in another layer of MK, as they warned us that breaking our vows would have severe consequences (which I didn’t believe, as it was contrary to “American values”).
In my 20s, I became an activist for peace, and later for social justice, and environmental sustainability. Along the way, I insulted the FBI with media releases exposing their most incriminating statements which I sent to 600 major media around the world, nearly every day of the 6-week “Judi Bari v FBI” federal trial – and the FBI was found guilty.
They stared me down in the hallways of the courthouse, damn scary dudes. They might have amped up my treatment then and following the trial, when I lived alone in the desert – things got extremely frightening after the trial, to the point I was ready to give up this life.
Perhaps they amped up my MK again when I published my book. And maybe they amped it up again each time I published a particularly hard-hitting blog or video. There seem to be correlations.
~
So now that I’ve given you an overview of my story, maybe answered the Why?, and I’ve gotten my paranoia out of the way – or demonstrated and acknowledged it at least – let me tell you my story….
To help me wrap my brain around it all – my fractured, fragmented mind full of experiences is often difficult to remember as a whole – I created a database to record all my anomalous experiences, from sublime to terrifying, everything out of the normal. My list is nearly 700 items long, and the last half of them have occurred in the last 5 years. Things are accelerating.
[to be continued]
Feedback? How’s this to open an update to my story?
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I’ve been downplaying the alien aspect of my experiences for the last few years, I just realized. (I only added “alien” to the tagline up top last night.)
Years ago, though, aliens were easier (for me) to discuss than the CIA or church involvement in sexual torture, so I tended to hide those angles then. But I believe all these aspects form a whole which desperately need exploration.
My first conference on aliens and spirituality I attended just before I moved to Silver City in 2006. Having read Harvard professor Dr. John Mack’s two books, Abduction and Passport to the Cosmos, which both comfortingly espouse alien contact as a spiritual or shamanic experience, I knew the two subjects composed a most important angle, though I also recognized the conference seemed to have ignored or downplayed two other very important facts: a) some aliens seem to be serious trouble, not here for our spiritual enlightenment, and b) our governments and many churches (both established by “the gods” in ancient history) are involved in the most troublesome aspects.
Paul Hellyer, former Minister of Defense, Canada
Eventually I attended many conferences on aliens (never any on mind control) and saw and met a lot of credible people – Paul Hellyer, former Defense Minister of Canada, for instance – and made a few strong friendships which contributed to my comfort with the alien angle and my then (subconscious) downplaying of the government and church role.
Darkactivities by aliens or government I only recall hearing twice, both times in Roswell. The first was a presentation in Roswell on Reptilians and the evidence of their working covertly with the US government in experimental projects using human subjects. (The city-sponsored conference forbids presentations on aliens as spiritual helpers.)
The second presentation on dark activities by aliens was at a nearby Christian Church (I attended “as a reporter,” I told myself). There, all aliens were defined as demons. Both presentations, when I listened with my multi-dimensional self, seemed as credible, in at least a limited way, as the scores of other presentations I’d seen espousing other angles.
All the angles are probably true in their own context, i.e., extra-dimensional beings of many sorts have many different agendas, some as cruel to us as human researchers are to rabbits, for instance; and some extra-dimensional beings wanting to help us, like missionaries, if we can get past our cultural programming enough to communicate with them across the dimensions. And everything in between, including dark aliens pretending to help, like spies, and possibly helpers accidentally hurting and terrifying us.
Lumping all aliens together under one word “alien” and then pinning a cartoon on that one word seems to have been a very effective way to “confuse our language” (as Jehovah did in Babel to keep the people from building their tower to access the stars), thereby keeping us from discussing our perceptions and having any chance of learning collectively. Collective mind control.
The Paradigm Salon, at first, was my attempt to create an event in which local people could talk after viewing films about “aliens,” but after a year I realized I was not comfortable sharing much of my own experience with strangers (even though I’d published it all in my book), and I also was not comfortable with some of the people who attended, so eventually I quit holding those events and turned to blogging.
In my journals, I constantly explored the connections between government mind control, churches, and aliens, but over the years, I’ve realized I’ve veered to the opposite imbalance in my blogging – I’ve been focusing on government and ignoring the alien component.
Richard Dolan’s UFO’s and the National Security State is an important book. Though I frequently recommend Richard’s books, I quit reading in the middle of his first book and never picked it up again – for what reason I don’t know.
On Thanksgiving, since we (thankfully!) made no plans, I sat for almost the entire day and read not only about “UFO’s” documented by various elements of the government, their chaotic responses, public statements, and reversals of public statements, but also the jockeying for control of this issue, executive orders, and creation of huge new bureaucracies that seemed in direct response to UFO sightings – bureaucracies like the CIA and NSA whose budget and activities would be entirely unaccounted for to the public or Congress or even the President.
And now I realize I need to catch up in my studies, so I intend to finish Richard’s series here and be more dedicated to keeping up with other books, blogs, and videos. And this time I determine not shy away from distinguishing aliens by type. And to begin, I’d like to make clear to my readers that I’m quite sure I’ve had contacts with Reptilians on both this dimension and in other dimensions, as well as the tall grays, and possibly others.
All these may be manifestations of Archons, described by the Gnostics of Christ’s time, and perhaps the same as are now called demons by contemporary Christians. Not a comforting thought at all, but the opposite to my cozy inclinations after reading John Mack.
Coincidentally, Reptilians have been noted by various researchers as being very involved in mind control. And Archons are said to feed off our “energies,” most easily gotten by inducing fear and hatred. Connections? Others have speculated far and wide, but I hesitate now to share any more of my speculations, especially since mind control and its “screen memory” theories throw everything up for grabs – but I hope to soon. (I’d love to hear from readers on these points, especially those with anonymity, who might feel braver to speculate.)
I’ve read and learned a great deal more over the years – and then forgotten it. I’ve also been crippled by the thought that assuming any particular “truth” in this arena, especially using particular names or language like “Reptilians” or “Archons” would discredit me in the eyes of the general public – and why I should care about that I don’t know, but I do sometimes; it might be mind control keeping me from pursuing this most promising direction, but it could also just be the isolation we experiencers feel – SO acute sometimes that we hide some of our truth. Very few of us blog under our real names.
UFO exploding before diving to the Earth, witnessed by my partner and another friend, while I could only hear their excited reactions. Interesting, and not nearly as threatening as alien mind control. You agree? Art: Asante Riverwind.
Experiencers of alien contact are sometimes even ignored inside the UFO movement! Yes, some researchers find the “nuts and bolts” of UFO’s so much easier to talk about than strange beings, government complicity, reproductive experiments, or other experiments for which there seem to be no easy-to-stomach explanation. Those researchers, I assume, think their activism is already tough enough. It reminds me of the women’s movement of the 19th century when they split over the question of banding together with Black activists for equal rights; the majority of feminists thought they’d be more successful if they only promoted the one “easier sell” and then helped Blacks “next.”
In the same way, sexual abuse and mind control are ignored for similar strategic reasons – they’re just a lot more difficult to explain and sell to a distracted populace, much less one’s Congress, where a lot of “UFO Disclosure” efforts are directed. Therefore, just as Blacks had to fight their battles mostly alone, we experiencers have to fend for ourselves until UFO’s are more widely accepted.
Meantime, I’m here on Earth to learn, heal, grow, strengthen connections with soul family on other dimensions, and serve my fellow humans. And this amazing journey requires I shed my blinders of mind control – both Earthly and “alien.”
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One of the biggest lies we’ve been told is that life – at least all the life we need be concerned with – stops at Earth’s atmosphere.
Not only does life not stop there, but neither does politics, war, commerce, science, or any other aspect of culture stop at Earth’s atmosphere.
Rather, we’re part of a larger community we’ve simply yet to understand collectively – sort of like cattle, sheep, and apple trees in an orchard don’t understand their situation – or maybe they do, better than we! (Except for those of us who’ve been forced to see what others have the luxury to ignore.)
There’s plenty of evidence, including documentation by the “ranchers” themselves, that we are, indeed, creatures, creation, projects, students, subjects, prey, a combination, or something else subservient to other wiser beings – evidence throughout time and throughout the world, across every culture, recorded on stone and clay tablets and papyrus and guarded for millennia.
Accepting the corollary lie that humans exist as the pinnacle of evolution, under no one’s control but our own, allows our real rulers to hide as “us,” and keeps humans from perceiving reality and thereby making continuing, serious political and other sorts of errors.
So activists (like I used to be) often beat our heads on the wall trying to communicate with politicians as if those others were operating from a human viewpoint, perhaps just skewed in a way that compelling information can correct. (Wrong. If they’re human, they’re beholden to and controlled by the Others.)
We are all in a web of multiple “spiritual” relationships, at least one of which is an increasingly tightly-controlled one with beings who do not have human motivations or Earth-protective intentions. This explains poisoning the Earth’s water and air, inserting “terminator genes” into our food genetics, fracking the Earth’s crust to poison underground water sources, grossly misinforming people, encouraging wars and racism, and so much more.
Many humans insist they find the idea of Others beyond Earth or beyond this dimension impacting our Earth experience impossible or unlikely. But the theory is entirely coherent with everything we see in Nature, including human nature: patterns of prey and predator, parasite and host, teacher and student, cooperation, collaboration, resource extraction, etc. My assertion is simply that it’s more extensive and multi-dimensional than we’ve been led to believe.
However, we’ve all learned very well by now not to limit our thinking to what we’ve been taught. And so I challenge us all to open our eyes to “hidden” realities.
Our human situation in relation to these Others today is totally unrecognized in social, political, religious and academic life. Unable to talk about it, we thereby don’t think about it. Result: a mild and not uncomfortable sort of cultural mind control. Not uncomfortable, but making us ineffective in our actions.
Some people who do acknowledge their extra-dimensional relationships describe them in spiritual terms: angel, god/goddess, teacher, guide, or spiritual helper. And I believe some extra-dimensional relationships are indeed that.
But others are apparently relationships much like we have with our animals, even our favorite animals: We cage them, control their diets, control their territory, operate on them, force medicine on them, breed them. We also allow others to treat animals in more grotesque ways and then pay those individuals to eat their animal products. Of course, there are also many worse treatments I’ll leave unspoken for now.
So, the idea that beings from other dimensions or planets seem to be a lot like us – greedy, conniving, lying, willing to inflict pain and discomfort – shouldn’t be received as if it were outlandish. On the contrary, we should call it normal, as it’s exactly like us! Maybe we even learned these negative traits from their treatment of us.
Therefore, when people report being experimented on by “aliens,” or having their DNA changed, or their eggs, sperm, or fetuses removed, or being dosed with drugs, or even bred – I wonder if people realize they’re rejecting as outlandish what human science is proud to announce, and what we often participate in and support with our dollars.
There are so many different beings, helpful and harmful, described throughout time, but they also have many similarities recounted across vastly different cultures, attesting to their reality.
Some may be like corporate raiders or resource extractors, and others akin to gods, angels, helpers, and guides. Others might be like researchers, ambassadors, or even missionaries. And demons are not beyond discussion.
We have a hard time judging this with the subject being taboo and our language intentionally skewed to confuse us – with all these being lumped together under one heading, “aliens,” which we’ve been taught to ridicule with silly cartoons.
To begin to learn, we need to identify each type and their intentions – which many researchers have begun, collecting data on over 100 different species, categorized by whether they collaborate with our government or not, and what activities they’re commonly reported as engaged in.
We are certainly Someone’s creation. (Most of the world’s religions and cultures agree with this, and we humans seem to have become Creators on Earth ourselves, so how can this be outrageous?) We may be their progeny, or their project. In any case, they may have expectations for us that are not our expectations.
Since their ways are not our ways (“saith the Lord”), their actions from other dimensions might not always translate properly to our three-dimensional minds, and we probably misinterpret a lot of experiences and assign wrong intentions and maybe even think things evil when they’re only obliviousness of our sensitivity (like we treat animals) or expediency for a purpose we don’t understand.
Some of it could be truly “evil” as all the world’s religions agree. And today we read so much in news (if the news is true) that seems patently evil; it would explain what people report and why our government denies so much that’s obvious.
Benevolent beings – let’s not forget – are all around us on other dimensions too, according to religion and contemporary testimony.
So it seems our life on Earth is a dance of dark and light, delight and horror, prey and predator, teacher and student, villain and savior, slaver and slave, parasite and host or combinations or permutations.
This may be frightening to some, but it’s coherent with human history, ancient and contemporary lore, biology, chemistry, and all of life.
It’s hard to accept that some of these intelligent beings are no more nice than humans. Microcosm, macrocosm.
Interestingly, opening our eyes to the hidden reality (seeing past the Big Lie) is the meaning of the word apocalypse – now laden with images of horror – not because that’s what the word means, but because it’s probably what must eventually come from millennia of our ignorance before we wake up and see.
Seeing with clear vision – the real meaning of the apocalypse – will be essential if we’re to survive as something like what we want to think of as “human.”
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[This no longer reflects my views on shamanism and Yeshua. For an update, see this blog.]
What is shamanism? How do I relate to shamanism? Is shamanism dangerous? How does it relate to mind control? Am I a shaman? Am I dangerous? Where does Jesus fit in? Who are “aliens”?
First, What is shamanism?
Shamanism exists across all cultures under different names, but the Siberian word has come to stand in for our contemporary understanding of the global, cross-cultural practice.
In all cultures, a few people (some estimate 2% or fewer) seem to have greater ability than others to perceive energies and intelligences in other dimensions and are often encouraged by their tribe to spend time in this practice of perception for the good of the people.
(The exception is for those born into a society hostile to or afraid of other dimensions, in which case, the shamanically-inclined person’s perceptions will be discouraged subtly or violently, i.e., those born in the United States.)
The natural shaman who is allowed to explore his or her facility will devote the majority of his or her life to learning to perceive more clearly, learning to protect him or herself from dangerous energies or intelligences, learning to communicate with useful and benevolent intelligences, and learning how to apply what they learn to help their tribe. They will be an important source of knowledge to the tribe, for instance on growing and harvesting food and medicines, knowing of food game migrations, knowing the approach of strangers or bad weather, and healing for various illnesses, physical, emotional, spiritual, and social.
Many shamans are those who suffered at least one serious trauma at a young age; it caused them to leave their body and thereby experience the multi-dimensional world beyond the mundane. For this reason, at least one tribe that I’ve heard of, when in need of a shaman, creates one intentionally by inducing a trauma on a young child in a carefully proscribed way: they separate a child of speaking age away from the tribe but within hearing distance in a cage where he or she is kept for a few years, cared for in a minimal way, but never spoken to or spent time with other than necessary. The child can hear the tribe, but cannot interact and so eventually begins to spend more time separating psychically from the mundane and social life of the tribe and turn his or her awareness toward the larger cosmos. This larger world, of course, includes other dimensions with other intelligences that they begin to interact with and with which they develop strong relationships. Eventually the tribe retrieves the child and reintegrates him or her with honor back into the tribe, but the young shaman is never again like the rest. For the rest of his or her life, the shaman will perform the daily work of seeking and delivering information and skills the tribe needs for survival and well-being.
Shamans generally communicate most effectively with intelligences in other realms when in an “altered” state of consciousness, which they self-induce by way of drumming, rattling, dancing, and sometimes using plant medicines. From the standpoint of those trained in church settings, with hymn books, “Sunday clothes,” choir robes, and certain proscribed decorum, especially of First World America, these methods may seem superstitious and perhaps frightening. This is, of course, a matter of cultural indoctrination.
How do I relate to shamanism?
The United States of America, of course, is not a culture that appreciates shamanic wisdom, but rather is hostile to it. So when I, as a young child, had interactions with child-like angels, went into portals at night (which came to me, though I could never open them on my own), and spoke with plants and animals, I learned quickly to keep these things secret, and soon decided to put them out of my life. Of course, when I began school, there was no time to investigate further with a schedule of American “education” and entertainment – probably designed so – and I soon “forgot” about my experiences.
I also remember the time I was told by beings who seemed like my family on other dimensions that I wouldn’t see them for “a very long time.” I was devastated and pleaded for them not to go away. They assured me it was necessary and they’d be watching over me, but I wouldn’t be able to be with them again for a long time. The unspecific “long time” was additionally distressing, as I had nothing to look forward to. They insisted I trust them and do my best on my own, promising they’d watch over me. (I recognize, with this story, that I can’t entirely blame America for discouraging my shamanic awareness; it might have been required anyway, for some reason I do not understand.)
As an adult I continued to experience occasional “non-normal” events, much less frequently, but still very amazing. I kept quiet about them, and this inclination was reinforced when I witnessed the mockery dealt to those who told of experiences like mine.
In 1994, at age 42, when my own children were on their own, I moved to the desert of Cochise County, Arizona, where for half of each week, I spent my days without clocks or calendar, eating when hungry, sleeping when tired, watching sunrises, sunsets, weather, animals, and the landscape changing with the seasons. I read and wrote about whatever I wanted whenever I wanted, and spent every sunset outside. The other half of the week, I attended graduate school for creative writing, and lived on student loans, which allowed me this indulgence.
After a year, I left the hermitage but returned in 2000, uncertain what I would be doing, but willing to live (simply, with no mortgage and few other expenses) on credit cards – for at least awhile. The freedom I gave myself seemed to open doors, and I was soon experiencing a wealth of non-normal events, which a friend put words to: a shamanic initiation.
Is shamanism dangerous?
That’s like asking if the world is dangerous. Yes, depending on what you do in the world or the other realms.
Some shamans don’t use discernment, get conned, and connect with evil or troublesome intelligences on other realms and are subsequently known as bad shamans, bad ministers, witches, brujos or brujas. (Good ones are known as shamans, good ministers, curanderos, curanderas, also brujos or brujas, witches, and many other names.)
How does this relate to mind control?
Bad shamans, I assert, can also be created by others – similar to the tribe’s method for good purposes, but this is done by controllers for potentially very dark purposes.
This, I believe, is a barely understood aspect of the darkest sort of mind control (MK), in which the subject is trained in psychic skills for other’s purposes, not for the good of the tribe.
Milder forms of mind control are of course also practiced broad-scale on the general populace, but I’m writing here about the darkest aspects of a most intense version of MK practiced on selected individuals, which involves the creation of amnesic super soldiers, couriers, spies, assassins, and sex slaves – and among them individuals with enhanced psychic abilities for remote viewing and more.
Our nation’s intelligence agencies have been highly interested in psychic powers for many decades, at least. And many adults who were made subjects of mind control experiments as children recall being tested for psychic skills. (I don’t have this particular memory, but I remember little other than MK intake and nightmares afterward. And I have noticed profound psychic events most of my life.)
If those intelligence agencies could train an army of psychic spies, of course they would. But they would need to make the psychic/shamanic spies totally loyal to them, and amnesic. The subjects’ shamanic skills might not even be known to the subjects and would be totally in service to the controllers.
I believe the process they put us through – mind control, or MKULTRA – included a perverse variation on the ancient, but apparently rare, tribal practice of creating shamans, only they isolated us and tortured us brutally, so that we’d be both amnesic and totally subservient.
It seems to have worked well enough, judging by the number of people who believe they’ve been used as psychic information gatherers for most of their lives, with memories of remote viewing (some of my experiences) and even some with memories of conducting spiritual warfare on behalf of others.
The army of MK subjects is aging now, and our control may be breaking down. With age, mental structures – including amnesic barriers – begin deteriorating. Memories that were supposed stay hidden begin to arise, and the controlled ones begin to put together pieces of what happened to them. Then, controllers have to weigh the risks and benefits of keeping them in service. They may still have value, may still perform their duties regularly enough, but they need reprogramming more and more often. I believe I’m in this latter category and that the frequency of physical wounds left on my body are evidence of this.
Some of us are also talking and educating others. That creates more work for someone in the system to discredit us or divert our communications efforts. If we become too much trouble, then they apparently kill the individual. But if they can manage the downsides without too much effort, they can continue using their assets (representing decades of investment).
While I’ve begun understanding all this, I’ve begun reclaiming my shamanic skills for my own uses.
Am I a shaman? Am I dangerous?
No, I’m not a shaman. I’m a common “shamanic practitioner” (meaning simply, at this point: I pray daily and spend time listening and recording).
I have occasionally been used to heal a number of people, receive messages from people who’d died unexpectedly, and other shamanic tasks. I didn’t try to do this and sometimes resisted, but spirit nudged me and I allowed the actions to flow through me.
I pray I’m not dangerous as a potentially controllable shamanic practitioner, but I don’t know for certain – which is why I quit working with activist groups and quit offering psychic, shamanic, and healing work (which I did for a very short while). It’s even why I quit my own private shamanic practice for a while: occasionally, I’ve thought it best to try to live only in the mundane world.
(Silly me. Once the extra-dimensional doors are open, it doesn’t seem possible to close them. Or else our other-dimensional helpers simply need us on this plane
and won’t leave us alone – as shaman Black Elk described in his biography.)
Taser burn (second-degree, removing skin) that appeared overnight, November 29, 2010, photographed two days later.
So I still wake up with evidence on my body that tells me that something was done to me in the night for which I have absolutely no memory: two Taser burns, four or five incidents of two or three obvious “scoop marks” or biopsies, many bruises including apparent injection bruises, lacerations inside my vagina, apparent implants in various locations, and mysteriously healed and obvious surgical and other scars – a total of well over one-hundred physical marks since I began recording them a decade ago (see photo history on this site). Plus many incidents of “missing time,” being conscious but immobilized, sensing vibrational/dimensional changes, being shot with energy beams, and even surrounded by strange fog forcing me to stop on the highway (one of three times).
I’ve tried not to assume the worst about this, that I’m being used by others for bad purposes. When I have assumed the worst, I’ve sought help, found none, and then wanted out of this life – but I feel very certain that that’s not best for my soul, so I stay and eventually come out of my depression. And I try to keep an open mind to other possibilities while also enjoying life and being a useful member of my community.
A positive explanation for all these marks is that they’re left by spirit family who, for whatever reason, can’t communicate with me because of my personal and our cultural mind control or other reasons, and actually all these things (or some of them) are for good, though I can’t understand now. But I have no support for this other than my own wish for a positive interpretation.
Where does Jesus fit in?
I’ve read a few times that there’s no historical evidence for the existence of Jesus, and I’ve read that there is. I don’t know.
I do know that I’ve had extremely positive experiences a few times in my life when I contemplated his teachings and also when I’ve called on him – even in thoughtless, terrorized shock – for protection. At those times I felt, not only that Christ was a powerful inter-dimensional being who could be called on for help, but that I know him on other dimensions, have known him for many lifetimes, and we’re kin.
So why am I not a “Christian”? I used to be. I even used to be a Christian minister’s wife. But I’ve had horrendous experiences with Christians, particularly in assisting my husband in wresting my children away from me for no more reason than that I believed divorce was acceptable. So today I have a visceral revulsion to the sight of pews in a church “sanctuary.” (I got my children back after two years.)
I consider Christ’s teachings and the Christian Church to be entirely separate things. After all, the Church was begun by the same government that for over 300 years used murder and torture to repress his followers; so it’s obvious to me that the Roman Church was the beginning of a massive disinformation campaign to attract would-be followers of Christ and trap them in religious routines. Protestants tried to get away from it, but each break-away group has been infiltrated and controlled in a similar manner. Even my last church, purportedly an independent “home church” where the dozen members would meet and take turns in leadership, was diverted in its intentions by a controlling couple who not only tried to take my children away from me, but did the same over a few years with two other divorcing couples, along with putting down any discussion of social justice (a major teaching of Christ’s) as “divisive.”
When I finally realized that rejecting the Church and rejecting Christ were two different things, I had to figure out how Christ fit into my shamanically-evolving life. For instance, would he accept my efforts to connect with and learn from power animals as well as him?
Here’s my conclusion to date: We live in an ocean of spirit, highly populated with good and bad, benevolent and evil beings, many in-between, evolving, stupid, not-so-stupid-but-not-helpful-enough-to-bother-with, and everything in between. Perhaps it swirls like an infinitely intricate yin-yang design. On the benevolent side is Christ as the leading light, teaching, prophesying, offering to save us and help us everyday; on the other side is everything we call evil, including mind control.
Here’s where my theology breaks from the masses: Even though Christ is an infinitely intelligent being, and infinite in powers, he doesn’t personally, magically do everything asked of him by his followers. I see his existence as much more natural and organic than that. As the largest tree in the forest doesn’t “do everything” for itself, but is served by birds, insects, fungi, moss, mammals, rain, etc., so Christ is served by other connected intelligences who serve our needs as go-betweens on Christ’s behalf.
Some people call the go-between intelligences the Holy Spirit or angels, others call them devas, faeries, elementals, and even aliens. I try to ignore the language because the cultural cartoons associated with the words get in our way of deeper, subtler understanding; cartoons are probably part of our cultural mind control, used to mock and disempower otherwise very empowering truths.
So I imagine an infinite field of intelligent energy, among which Christ is supreme, at least at this arm of our galaxy, at least for me and those of us who choose to align with him. When we direct energy and requests his way, the same way a tree root directs a need toward fungi in the soil, the communication is heard and responded to via a series of interactions, not a simple two-part process; and our needs are met in the multi-dimensional world in a similar manner as needs are met in the natural world on the material plane, via many interactions with many parts, intelligences, or beings.
As a shamanic practitioner, communicating in the multiple dimensions, I petition Christ first and last. Often, he seems to respond by sending a particular person, angel, situation, or spirit animal (or physical animal) my way.
I used to feel very conflicted about this, as though I were hedging my bets, not being loyal to The One – though The One is All, many say. Then I attended a shamanic conference and witnessed three-quarters of a roomful of a hundred-and-fifty shamanic practitioners raise their hands to the question “Who considers Jesus Christ a major help among your spirit helpers?” That gave me permission to trust my vision of this world as a great network of evolving intelligence, inside which I could align myself with Christ, but still be connected to all that was also aligned with him, which is a huge net of Life on many dimensions.
And then I read about the Avodah Zarah, a Jewish text, in which Christ was called Yeshua ben Panther – a very shamanic-sounding name! (Similar to “Lion of Judah” and “Lion of God,” other Biblical names.) And I recalled Christ saying that we would “do all these things [healings, he was speaking of] and more” – exactly what shamans do!
While Christians may pray to Christ each day, their practice is usually based on following proscribed doctrine – words delivered by others – which tell them how to live in this material world. I, on the other hand, have very little doctrine, and that which I have I’ve developed from my own personal experience.
Recently I’ve renewed my dedication to devote a great deal of my time to prayer and communicating with Christ and other intelligences in the other realms, and my communications are most successful when I alter my consciousness and focus my attention into other dimensions using the shamanic practices of drumming and rattling, but that’s not always necessary. The right heartfelt attitude is enough, but the rituals are important focusing activities.
Who are “aliens”?
First, as I’ve said many times, “aliens” is too big a concept for the word to be useful – like using “marine life” to describe everything from algae to whales to human’s submarines.
I’ll use the word, though, to indicate all intelligence not bound to this mundane, three-dimensional planet, i.e., extra-terrestrial and/or extra-dimensional beings.
Many of them are reputedly “good,” supporting our evolution, while some seem to be at the very least challenging our evolution or, at worst, imprisoning us and controlling our minds, and maybe even harvesting genetic material. I don’t know, but others have risked everything dear to them to assert such “crazy” ideas, and I hate to say that I also seem to have evidence all these things as well.
My experience with “aliens” does not include any that seem like the typical small “grays” with large, slanted, all-black eyes. Rather, I’ve been unfortunate to have been terrorized by the types called Reptilians, even though until they became conscious to me, I’d thought the tales were unfortunate disinformation meant to discredit the whole field regarding aliens. I’ve also seen over a dozen UFO’s, sometimes with others as witnesses.
Many researchers have documented connections between mind control and aliens, Reptilians in particular. And while I’ve not read much of their reporting on the subject, I’ve developed my own theory, admittedly vague (vagueness is my inclination while trying to understand multi-dimensional reality with a three-dimensional mindset – seems only honest, given the limitations of language).
My vague theory is this: I believe that, among all the alien intelligences interacting with Earth, most are benevolent, akin to anthropologists, researchers, observers, diplomats, teachers, and prophets, and to other mindsets, angels. But there also exists other intelligence, more self-serving, among them the Reptilians, akin to pirates, corporate resource raiders, and to other mindsets, demons.
This is the “exo-political” viewpoint. (The word exopolitics was coined by Alfred L. Webre, JD, author of Exopolitics and former Jimmy Carter White House appointee, who called my book “an important historical document”). He writes, “We live in a highly populated cosmos.”
(Some even say no aliens are actually evil, as “All is God,” but they are only provoking us to greater spiritual awareness and development. I have a very hard time with this idea, having experienced childhood sexual abuse as part of my fracturing and mind control, but sometimes I truly feel this real possibility – that “It’s all okay.”)
Conclusion
Our already-complex, Earth-bound political views need to be expanded beyond this Earth, and thereby made even more complex (sorry to put on the pressure!), in order for us to understand our multi-dimensional reality and situation.
Until we do that, we are all mind-controlled, to greater or lesser extent, to limit our vision and laugh at anything larger, and thereby miss understanding who we are and where our dangers and our powers lie in the larger cosmos. In accepting this simplified version of life, we remain terribly vulnerable and unable to appropriately address any of our social, environmental, political, psychological, and spiritual issues. And indeed the world does seem incredible “stuck.”
So, even though this world wants to laugh at “aliens,” laugh at “Jesus Christ” (made such a mockery on television and in movies in particular), and perhaps roll our eyes at shamanic practice, I have to say: I was forced to overcome my own personal aversions to all of these and was then finally able to open my mind to the reality of Christ and all the other intelligence in the cosmos.
It was difficult because I then also saw the dark energies surrounding us, and me. Christians have tried to “save” me (again), but I’ve chosen to align with Christ in my own manner, on my own two humble feet, not under the authority of another minister. I’ve been working (more consistently since my last dark three days) to strengthen my connections to Goodness and to break the bonds of mind control.
Like everything in life, the struggle continues. There’s no easy fix. (Shamans must continue to protect themselves daily). And with each day, generally, I become stronger. Sometimes I’ve wanted to give it up, the struggle is sometimes so difficult, but those days pass, and I find I’m stronger yet each time.
Most days, I live quite happily, a formerly “closet”-shamanic practitioner, coming out. Sometimes I’d prefer to avoid the term shamanism, so loaded with cultural misunderstanding, but for others, the word says it perfectly. So here I am: A minister, writer, activist, and someone who relates to spirit in a manner we call shamanic.
Jean Eisenhower
Silver City, NM
August 9, 2014
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I read it to my children decades ago but only recalled that it was about a family of scientists and precocious kids and something about time travel. And I remembered liking it very much.
Well, my partner and I just finished listening to it, and I was blown away!
This book is also about top-secret government projects (risking people’s lives, by the way), aliens, being taking into other dimensions without warning, being immobilized and unable to communicate, being lied to, being helped by beings who were at first frightening, and more that had so many parallels to experiences being discussed by myself and my readers and fellow-bloggers – that it seems worthy of new discussion.
The book asks some of the same philosophical questions that we’ve asked over the years. So, I hope folks will check out the book or audio book, enjoy it, and let me know how you think this relates to “our stuff.”
And now, I’ve looked for art to add to this post and am intrigued by the various covers that have been used on her book over the years – and new art, for instance used for the television program. Check it out:
This one, above, evokes the shamanic themes that affirm our extra-dimensional potential.
This depicts the children “going” together, a lot more confident than the story actually described.
This combines the alien face with angel motif.
And this conveys the sense of isolation and powerlessness.
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The videos in my last blog were those I’ve “liked” at some point (recently “weeded out” for those most pertinent to the subjects here).
I also have 35 videos specifically chosen to be on my website, which I’d also like to share with you.
If you want to sit back with popcorn some evening, like we sometimes do, and educate yourself on a subject with a variety of different starting places and assumptions, you might try this collection, which can play one-after-the-other while you relax:
There are 10 hours worth of viewing. And please jump ahead whenever you need to be picked up by something inspiring or fun – please!
If you want to select your videos, I’ve re-grouped them below according to subject, putting mind control last and starting with videos that might help some stretch and exercise the “rational” and programmed mind, if needed. Enjoy!
I’ve been wrestling with ideas for a few days now, standing as far back as I can for the cosmic big picture, trying to see things in as exact opposite a manner as I can imagine, then turning things sideways and looking again, approaching repeatedly from different angles. Getting outside my mystical head in a rational philosophical exercise, and as I often do, trying to reason from my Christian brother’s point of view, hoping to see something new.
And today I re-watched a YouTube video about Archons – the ancient, inorganic intelligences that the Gnostics said control humanity and are often observed as being of either of two types: humanoid-reptilian or fetus-like – very similar to descriptions by “alien abductees.”
Since I’ve experienced reptilians more than once, I wonder that I didn’t chose to follow up on this theory long ago. Probably because it would be too frightening to believe. Military mind control is bad enough. Military mind control programmers working under the direction of reptilian humanoids, no thanks! So I tried not to think about them, and didn’t make judgement on their nature, practicing denial.
Besides, I’d also been having blissful experiences with extra-dimensional beings on a regular basis for a few years and intermittently throughout my life, and these mystical experiences were sometimes difficult to put into either the blissful or terrifying category. And when I tried, I felt the need to do what seemed impossible, spiritually, so I eventually backed off my theory, in hopes of coming to some other conclusion I could more easily deal with!
I have known for a long time that we live in “an ocean of spirit,” including everything from malevolent archons, to angels, archangels, ghosts of every caliber, aliens who care about us and may be our kin, animal spirits, elementals, devas, fairies, gnomes, and much more – not because I read about them, but because I’ve either interacted with them personally or met people who have.
So when confronted with reptilian energy forms, I found it shocking at first, but not so far-out. But because of my extremely negative experiences with Christianity (including darkly suspicious control over my children), I was willing to ignore Christian-type warnings about reptilians and other aliens and instead look first at all the other mystical literature to see what matched my own experience.
Almost a decade has gone by now, and I can no longer believe that humans are acting under their own volition as they vote to allow corporations to destroy the rain forests, kill the oceans, frack fault lines, make war on three other countries at once, steal economic wealth, and introduce “death genes” into our plant food sources.
Humans wouldn’t do that. Unless they are being mind controlled by something that is not human. This is the only explanation that suffices. And it happens to be what the Gnostics warned of over 2,000 years ago: Archons. And a version of the story is in the Bible and other sacred texts and folklore all over the planet. So I’ll accept it.
Besides, my personal experiences of “the vibe” of these beings fits the story told by the Gnostics.
The Gnostic view of the Archons, according to John Lamb Lash and others, simplified and amplified (I hope correctly) by myself:
– They are inorganic beings, akin to thought forms or programs, which were created by Sophia (by accident) before humanity or Earth were created, but having forms related to us humans because we and the Earth are also of Sophia.
– They have two forms: one of a fetus-like being, passive and obedient, and the second reptilian in form (energetic, not material), excessive, and feeding on energy, particularly human fear and hatred. (These two types correspond to the aliens called “grays” or “Zetas” and reptilians.”)
– They provoke fear and hatred (their nourishment) in humanity through politics, warfare, religion, education, poison, malnutrition, pharmaceuticals, and entertainment, as well as through torturous individual mind control. With all these tools, they “milk” our energy and take some of us for experimentation.
– They are limited in various ways: They don’t have intention, but only programming (which they work to imprint on us, making us “in their image”); they can’t stay in this three-dimensional world for very long; and they are arrogant, which skews their thinking.
The Gnostics counsel that our protection against them is personal spiritual work, particularly with the gift of Sophia: our creative imagination.
And that is exactly how I have thwarted them. And when I’ve failed to do that, well, they seem to sap my energy for a few days, and then I come back to myself. My task now is to use my creative imagination for better protection.
The ultimate prediction for the Archons is that their own arrogance and overreach will be their downfall. And we can see this on the Earth right now: their excesses stripping the Earth of her life, threatening the species which is their own food (us), thereby threatening their own existence.
More about Archons is in this 2-part (15 minutes each) video, the most succinct and useful version I’ve found of this info:
And here, for those of you not turned off by accounts of people using entheogens (hallucinogens or plant medicines), a report by a man who experienced reptilian entities and describes them very much as I also experienced them:
Also: I like Jim Nichol’s series of videos, of which the 7th of a 24-part series (5-minutes each) is here with an important message for me, specifically a message channeled by Barbara Marciniac purportedly from Pleiadeans, which I rejected before (and threw away the book) but am open to now:
Jim also articulates the same understanding of Jesus as I have throughout my writings, both his spiritual teachings and the political disinformation launched against him, followed by all-out terrorism, murder, and destruction of ideas – mind control – eventually perverting his teachings into a state-sanctioned doctrine, with the crucifix as the visual reminder of what happens to radical teachers.
I just ran across a video I saw a few months ago and felt was an important contribution to understanding what’s going on in our world, with all the environmental and economic and social justice catastrophes, including mind control.
It’s called “Our Masters – the Archons,” and details the Gnostic texts that describe these inorganic beings which act as parasites on the human mind, which we can only survive with spiritual practice.
It begins with the gnostic writings predating Christ (who was a Gnostic, encouraging people to practice personal spiritual work rather than submit to any hierarchy) discovered in Nag Hammadi and suppressed, of course, by the Church of Rome.
I read more about the Archons, including opinions by Jacques Vallee, whom I strongly admire as an early and minority voice in the UFO/alien debates:
Interestingly, this Gnostic insight accords closely with the view of Jacques Vallee, who maintains that ET/cyborgs probably belong to the local planetary realm. Vallee also proposes [in Messengers of Deception] that the ET/UFO enigma is a “spiritual control system,” a phenomenon that “behaves like a conditioning process” [mind control]. This is exactly what Gnostics said about the Archons: they can affect our minds by subliminal conditioning techniques.
And further on:
Delving into the Gnostic materials, it is quite a shock to discover that ancient seers detected and investigated the problem of alien intrusion during the first century CE, and certainly well before. (The Mysteries date from many centuries before the Christian Era.)
What is amazing about the Gnostic theory of the Archons is not only the cosmological background (explaining the origin of these entities and the reason for their enmeshment with humanity), but the specificity of information on the alien m.o., describing how they operate and what they want from us. For one thing, Gnostics taught that these entities envy us and feed on our fear. Above all, they attempt to keep us from claiming and evolving our “inner light,” the gift of divine intelligence within.
While I would not claim that Gnostic teachings on the Archons, or what remains of such teachings, have all the answers to the ET/UFO enigma, one thing is clear: they present a coherent and comprehensive analysis of alien intrusion, as well as specific practices for resisting it. They are far more complete and sophisticated than any theory in discussion today.
In short, the ancient seers of the Mysteries in Europe and the Levant seem to have accomplished 2000 years ago what many of us have been attempting to do since 1947: figure out who the ETs are, where they originate, how they relate to us, and most important of all, how we ought to relate to them.
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I envy people whose stories are simpler than mine, perhaps involving just one sort of alien – especially a helpful sort who conveys spiritual wisdom and encouragement. That would be very nice.
I’m fortunate to have also had those sorts of positive “alien” experiences, and to also have had profound spiritual experiences since early childhood. For those I’m very grateful, and I doubt I’d be here today if I hadn’t had them.
The biggest complicating factor in understanding my own story is that I was also a mind control subject in my childhood, and I’ve experienced what seems to be ongoing interference by mind controllers in my life up into fairly recent years.
This problem has a few parts:
1) How can I describe the relationship between my alien, spiritual, and mind control experiences when the culture lumps all “aliens” together? Clearly, we need to acknowledge the wide variety of aliens, some working for our good, and others for our subjection, and then acknowledge that mind control – often called “government” mind control – is almost certainly a collaboration between certain aliens and “above-top-secret” levels of government.
Obviously, all our terms need to be defined carefully before we can begin to communicate effectively. To do this, one can begin with the work of Michael Salla, which seems quite well-researched and credible to me. It’s odd that I’ve had a strong resistance to passing on anyone else’s work without researching it myself, even though I’m not an academic researcher who needs to impose these parameters on my work. (Have I, a mystic at heart, been mind controlled to resist getting further in my own understanding with these strict parameters, when I might have simply said, “It resonates,” and leave it at that?) In any case, up until now, I’ve told myself that I really didn’t know for certain, and therefore I couldn’t write about this – very disempowering maybe mind control keeping me silent in recent years.
2) Acknowledging that there are aliens working for our positive evolution and others working for our subjection, it’s terribly frightening, humiliating, and, maybe to some people, discrediting for me to say I’ve been messed with seriously by the controlling ones. This being the case, will anyone want to listen to me?
3) Sometimes it seems the controllers have interfered in my Internet communications with people important to me. If they can do that, what’s the point of writing at all?
4) Also, being that they’ve broken into my house and physically accosted me in terrible ways (the worst a Taser attack leaving a serious burn on my arm, and my body and spirit severely weakened for days) after some of my writing, am I courageous enough to try again?
5) Assuming I will overcome all the above, the most important thing I wan to communicate is that we can overcome everything in right relationship with our spiritual help and with the good aliens – but am I doing that well enough?
I am humbly on this spiritual path, as Whitley Strieber says, “On the path and off the path – that’s the Path” – but is it good enough? Do I have a “right” to talk at this point? Must I be stronger, or will I get stronger as I walk the walk?
6) Accepting this calling, I finally return to the heart of my issues: To define the grand picture of “aliens,” helpful and controlling, Spiritual beings, and the above-top-secret governmental experimenters in mind control – and their relationships with each other and mine with them.
It’s a sometimes-frightening story. It’s amazing to me the number of grown men (not women, interestingly) who tell me, “I couldn’t finish your book, because it’s too frightening.” I don’t want to scare people, and I don’t want to pretend everything’s okay. I’ve done both, and neither feels fully honest.
To tell the full story truthfully, I need to write a very long book (like Niara Isley’s), but I was trained to write news – briefly, succinctly, only the facts, little back-story. People have called my writing “Hemingway-esque.” I wrote my straightforward book, RattleSnake Fire: a memoir of extra-dimensional experience, refusing to elaborate much on my conclusions, letting the readers draw what they would. Many respectable people have praised the book, but I really need to tell a whole lot more, and so I haven’t marketed my book for years, and I quit doing media interviews also years ago.
So this is where I am today: ready to acknowledge the challenges, move past them, and lay out my experiences with all those connections between me and Spirit, “aliens” of different sorts, and mind control.
Essays coming.
Thanks for staying in touch.
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A common truism is that sometimes we need to step away from a problem, sometimes for a long period of time, before we can return to it and perceive it correctly.
For years, I have been keenly aware of my “problem” of interpreting my “anomalous” life experiences, and was very open to information and ideas, but I had chosen to not wrestle with the issues, not read very much about the subject (after a few years of voracious reading), and not pursue any conclusions I was willing to share completely.
The reason for my passive curiosity probably involved a few varieties of fear, cloaked in a philosophical “everything in its time” together with a sense that I needed to “ground myself” better first.
And so I spent a few years teaching English and the last year teaching Permaculture – environmental design – but always knowing in the back of my mind that I have a responsibility to make sense of my anomalous experiences and, because I’m a writer, to share what I learn.
Recently I began reading my friend Niara Isley’s memoir, Facing the Shadow, Embracing the Light, and was so impressed by her fearless wrestling with issues very like my own, that I put down her book halfway through and began to read again, selectively, and watch videos (most which seemed mostly un-credible but very educational regarding the lies told us as a culture), and began to feel much of my experiences begin to fall into a meaningful design.
I’ve been documenting “anomalous” experiences in my private journal for years, and occasionally I’ve posted experiences on my website, but I’ve always been very aware that I was not articulating any progress toward a larger, more coherent worldview. Instead I was living with an ongoing “mush” of experiences, including some that terrified me, for which I had a vague, deep-in-my-heart feeling that they would eventually lead me to some coherence.
Why the delay? Maybe it was “only” my fear. Or maybe my spiritual help knew I needed more emotional and physical support, which I now have, to overcome that fear.
In any case, the time away from the subject has been productive. I now have ideas stirring that I will be working to put into essays, tying together the experiences that I have long put into three categories – spiritual, alien, and government/mind control – sometimes uncertain into which categories they belonged, and therefore I was unwilling to state exactly what I believed was the meaning and relationships between them all.
I intend to post the first of these new essays very soon.
Thanks for reading.
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The core message of an experience and message 18 months ago:
(An explanation for this re-re-posting is below. Since I am as cynical of “messages” as anyone, I am very open to critical feedback and discussion.)
The gist of the message I received was this:
Humans are a flawed design, but don’t feel bad about it, because so is everything. Everything evolves and gets better. Nearly everything on your plane of life “goes extinct” in its various forms eventually.
It’s not a tragedy because everything also continues to live. It’s all how you look at it. The genetics still exists. For instance, we can recreate the mammoth if we want. And some humans will survive, just not all of you as individuals. The ending of an era is not a cause for grief. It’s just a fact of evolution. We’ll keep the best and recycle the rest.
There are a few reasons for this. One, the Earth needs to heal from the damage you’ve caused, just like a garden needs to have its dead plants turned under to replenish the soil. It’s not so much a time for grief, but for rest and renewal.
But it’s a little more urgent than that. The second reason for the transition is that your race is endangering not just life on Earth, but the stability of many adjacent dimensions with many other beings in them. We’ve done damage control around your extensive and nuclear war-making since the 1940s, but for the most part your race continues to get more destructive and dangerous. So, it’s a matter of self-protection on our part.
Third, genetic selection is our work. Your race, as a whole, is clearly too violent and greedy, driven by excessive emotions. We’ve sent prophets to try to teach you to control your flaws, and we’ve even made genetic changes over the eons, but the emotional factors keep re-emerging and do a lot of damage. The result of this violence of one human against another is that the majority of individuals are starving, poisoned, or psychologically damaged and are not healthy.
Many of you think the destruction can and should be prevented by “God” or “aliens,” but cycles of destruction and new creation are a fact of life on Earth. They have been described and foretold in every culture and time, so it should be understood and accepted. It only comes as a surprise to some because your culture relegated these stories to barely tolerated “mythologies” which few have taken seriously.
No one will “burn in hell.” All will be recycled, just as all life on Earth has always been. Some souls will return to the Creator-Mother-Father-Source to emerge in new forms, while others with enough soul integrity will evolve as some manifestation of their current selves – according to the integrity of their souls. This is not quite a Judgement Day as depicted by many religions, but simply a sorting out of what things are – the wheat separated from the tares, to use Christian imagery.
Some of you and your genetics will evolve. Those whose genetics have allowed them to live without excess greed or violence may continue to evolve in human-like bodies, some adapted to realms beyond Earth.
In addition, many of you have already been having your genetic material harvested (in activities you’ve called “abductions”) throughout your lives, which means that you have been chosen as genetic forebears of entire new races – though most of you have been unaware of it.
While we admire and have selected you for your genetics, many of you have objected to being treated like “breeding stock,” as if that’s a lowly thing, to be compared to cattle. This betrays your arrogance that has been part of the human problem. “All is God,” as many have said, including cattle, and you. It has been unfortunate that most of your leaders and teachers haven’t respected the whole of Creation and so you’ve looked down on and mistreated cattle.
Some of you “experiencers” haven’t liked being kept amnesic when we took you to harvest sperm and eggs, but ours was a large operation, and many of those who have written critically about their treatment have not understood that when we did try to explain our program to a few humans, they were often very upset by the information, as it didn’t fit into their existing reality. Occasionally, when some human seemed able to handle the information, we dropped the amnesia bit by bit and shared as much as the person could handle, usually just a little. Then when the information was accepted, if the person tried to share it, he or she was usually socially ostracized and suffered for that. So it never seemed worth indulging human curiosity. We’re sorry you took offense.
So while some of you and your progeny will survive as humans, a vaster number will be hybrid human-aliens, as you say, though this word alien is a major misconception. The human has been a hybrid alien for a very long time. And we are all hybrids, from almost the beginning of time. So this hybrid program is not an affront to your sovereignty, as some would say; it is simply a continuing process of evolution. Life continues on as it always has. And all life is “sacred”: the worm, the cattle, the human, we overseers (your creators in a sense), and your hybrid progeny.
Apocalypse, you know, means revealing or unveiling – which is coming soon for everyone. Apocalypse, as you know, does not mean catastrophe, but catastrophe will cause the apocalypse or time of seeing. People will require the “catastrophe” to wake to the larger reality of their existence. Chaos has always evolved those with more potential. This is because people can’t see or act when they are too comfortable or uncomfortable.
On your planet, the greed-inducing and fear-inducing rulers kept their populations in one of these states at all times, through economic pressures and rewards, but also by using other tools of control: entertainment, laws, prisons, education, chemicals, etc. For instance, most of the population, stressed economically and in other ways into a state of bad health, is unable to respond when they sense a larger reality, and they generally chose to hypnotize themselves into quiet passivity. Others chose not to respond because they are distracted by the luxury of so many entertainments. Occasionally, when the balance of control mechanisms shifts enough to allow a population to rebel, rulers respond with prison and various tortures which drive the people back into silence.
Obviously, it’s not a pretty picture.It’s been directed by beings – not humans, but using human rulers as functionaries – who use the human tendency to violence and are corrupting the potential of the human race, thereby endangering dimensions beyond this Earth plane. It’s time for us to intervene.
For this reason, as we have explained to your “experiencers” or “abductees” many times, we have every right to protect ourselves and to remove our selected genetic stock and other planetary resources from the Earth before the catalyzing event. And it’s “for your own good,” though we know many will indignantly reject this. The alternative of protecting or rescuing the current regime, given that so few humans are given the opportunity to live meaningful lives and the whole planet and other dimensions are threatened, is simply not feasible. It’s time to clear the slate – the time of “harvest,” as Yeshua called it.
A complete account of the message and context in which it was received was posted in July 2012 and reposted yesterday, though I took down the repost as redundant, and replaced it with this “gist.” Three synchronicities in the last few days led me to work on this reposting.
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It’s been 7 1/2 years since I left my 7-year hermitage on the western slope of the Chiricahua Mountains in southeastern Arizona and moved to the town of Silver City, New Mexico, to recreate my life.
I’d been experiencing bizarre, confusing, and sublime events for years, some seeming like alien and UFO contact, some that felt shamanic and promising, and others that seemed to involve government agents who could immobilize me and leave marks on my body that terrified me with my helplessness.
I’d been drawn in different directions: to bravely face the Mystery, strengthen my spirit, and open myself to teachings from the Unknown, and alternately cower in fear and even consider killing myself rather than let some unknown agents use me against my will.
Ultimately, I’d become afraid I was “a sitting duck” out there in the country alone, so I left the home I’d lovingly crafted over all those years out of straw, mud, and stone in natural shapes, and returned to society in rectangles of space and time, seeking new experiences to help me understand.
One of the first things I did was look for a UFO/alien conference that might frame my questions in terms of spiritual awakening. I was thrilled to find this very conference was taking place within weeks of being paid for selling my home – and the conference was in Hawaii, with extra events available for those who wanted to swim with dolphins and discuss experiences – for ten days! – with others who believed in the spiritual potential of understanding the UFO/alien connection.
There is no unanimous theory among this subset of people experiencing what has been called “alien.” Some seem to me to be terribly naive, others I distrust as manipulators, and liars, masquerading as exactly opposite of who they profess to be.
Of course, I’ve also considered that I could be paranoid. And, alternately, that I could be naively hopeful myself, and my safety might lie in taking my fears more seriously. So many conflicting theories; so many possible contexts in which to reevaluate my scores of experiences over my lifetime; so difficult, at times, to know what to believe about my own mind.
But I’ve tried: I meditated. I was hypnotized. I prayed. I did ritual. I talked with others. I attended shamanic conferences and events. I refused to read books on the subject in order to keep my perceptions pure and untainted. Then one day I decided to read books to compare my experiences with others’. And I ignored the stuff, testing the theory that it was all in my head, and I could make it go away if I gave it less energy. I tried to live a normal life.
But animals and even plants kept communicating. I saw things. I participated in healings. I tested theories, and other people played out the results.
I kept records of my memories and anomalous events. I studied and collated those events; then I went for years without looking at them, to frame them against the “normal world.” I exercised my rational mind to assure myself that I had looked at these experiences from every vantage point possible. And I worked to plant myself humbly within the mundane world for “grounding” and waited patiently for the big picture to come into view.
Ultimately, I accepted that I’d been invited by multi-dimensional beings to expand my consciousness and see more than the limited dimensions of this mundane world.
Eventually I traveled distances to talk to others who’d experienced events similar to mine.
I became a certified Transpersonal Hypnotherapist™.
I prayed for a teacher to lead me, and none came. Or maybe many came.
For awhile I partnered with a Native American man who’d been invited by his grandfather, a Tewa medicine man, to learn the practices of a shaman. He had accepted the training, then chose the option to not go forward and left the training. It was a comfort to have affirmed the truism that the shaman’s is not an easy path, is indeed hazardous, and must be undertaken with clear sight, and is not for everyone.
It’s okay to say, This is not for me – so it’s said, but it seems that the spirits sometimes insist.
I wondered why I had found myself invited in the first place.
Was I like the man in the medieval woodcut peeking under the veil to see the many layers of reality? Or was I failing my destiny for having not taken up the challenge with my total heart and soul?
Or was it more mundane than that? Had I simply been taken as a child by government mind-controllers (evil demons or their human minions?) whose programming had exposed me to multi-dimensional reality, of which I was not developed spiritually enough to comprehend, so it was right for me to pull back from experiences I couldn’t yet negotiate safely?
I spent years in the mental tug of war, pulled between spiritual desire and utter terror of those who seemed able to enter my home at any time and leave me sick with mysterious wounds – or I found a tenuous balance between those ideas, which I tried to maintain, but never for long.
I certainly couldn’t focus too seriously on making a living, developing a new career, impressing clients that I really cared about their events I was hired to plan. There were days when I laid in bed and wondered what options did I have to protect myself beside suicide.
I knew others who hosted weekly or monthly groups for “experiencers,” and I tried the same, showing movies and hosting discussions that I hoped would help me find others with whom I could share more honestly the full range of my experiences, but too often my groups attracted people whom I didn’t fully trust. I spent thousands of dollars I couldn’t afford and gave myself the reputation in this new community as – I can only guess – another weird person with weird ideas.
I continued to experience strange intrusions in my life. More than once I woke up to discover perfect (surgically-created?) half-spherical “scoops” removed from my right finger, left scapula, and when I posted about that, a line of scoops across my anus. Another time, I suffered for more than a day with extreme fear and nausea after waking on a urine-soaked mattress with a Taser-burn on my right forearm. Once I drove into a strange fog on a remote section of highway, experienced a flood of strange sensations as my perceptions of time, space, sound, and visuals failed to correspond with each other, ending with the sight of the Continental Divide sign (at the top of the mountain ridge, of course) approaching me from below. And that is just one of three weird highway events.
Today, I do not have a conceptual framework I’m willing to share, except vaguely. I believe the larger framework, the larger Realty, is simply beyond what we humans have language for, or at least beyond what English-speaking Americans have language for. Like all wise ones have said. We see through a glass darkly. The Tao that can be spoken is not the Tao. Reality is far bigger and more complex than our words.
Since childhood, many of us have been told that spiritual realities are not real, and most of us have been forced into compulsory eduction, in which we’re forced to spend our days focused on the material world, and forced to see it the way our teachers tell us it is. Eventually, we forget how to perceive other realities, all the other dimensions and wavelengths of energy beyond the narrow bands of human-perceived light and human-perceived sound. And there’s so much more. And then we interpret those narrow bands of vibrational information according to the rules that the teachers relay to us, and only decades later we learn that those rules are in no way certain, but our minds have been trained to work within their limits.
I admit: so much of this game feels “evil” in every sense of the word: So much of it is contrary to Life. The rules of economics, for one example, murder countless people, decimate nations, and destroy the health of the very planet we depend on for all life.
Still, it seems wrong to call all this death “evil,” and it’s my garden that gives me pause in using that word. Underneath the most lovely rose – and everything else alive in the garden – is a mix of life and death at its darkest complexity.
I’m no longer sure the terms “Evil” and “Good” hold significant meaning. While Christians and other faiths find great importance in these concepts, I have begun to doubt them.
In my garden, for example, death is an essential component of life. At the roots of the rose are an infinite number of dead things. All the plants grow because they are fed with dead, dying, and rotting things. The volvox, reputedly the first sexually-reproducing life form on Earth, requires – and probably introduced the requirement for – death eventually of all sexually-reproducing life.
Children commonly misinterpret the well-intentioned actions of their parents as “mean” and only decades later understand the need for those actions.
Children and adults seem to need to hurt themselves in order to learn about the consequences of our actions. Simple things like learning to be conscious and pick up our feet are only learned by tripping and falling down.
Shamans and healers commonly recount terrifying ordeals in alternate realities that they must experience in order to learn their skills.
Many adults credit very tough life experiences for their maturity and even their greatest qualities.
Social movements gain momentum by sacrifices, sometimes human ones.
Et cetera. So I conclude that just because I have physical scars and mental ones does not mean that I have been treated cruelly by evil beings. It may simply be Life. Or even my Creator. I don’t know.
But I do know this: I have become less afraid and less resentful. And less certain that our Creator or “God” or “the gods” are necessarily “kind” or “evil” according to our way of judging.
I perceive a lot of truth in all the religions of the world, and most philosophies. I also perceive a lot of lies and manipulation in religion and politics, education/academia, media/entertainment/news, society, etc. But I feel less judgement toward it, less concerned with condemning it, more ready to compare our society to that of ants: just getting their job done, maybe enslaving smaller ants if they themselves are large.
Even my sweet cat, Peaches, is a killer and tormentor of helpless lizards, birds, and mice.
Finally, the condemnation directed so commonly toward aliens, or human mind controllers, or alien mind-controllers, for the ways they treat their human subjects is no different from the ways we humans treat the other living beings around us. I can imagine my indignation if I was treated the way I treat my cat – which I think is excellent: fed high-end “pet” food, with little variety (a lot for a cat, I think, but far less than I give myself), perhaps missing vital nutrients (how can I know for sure?), confinement, and more. And the way other humans treat animals in their homes, labs, and ranches – the aliens probably compare quite well to many human scientists. And so I feel silly getting too upset about the things that I have experienced.
(And I wonder if we humans might be treated better if we treated our animals better? As above, so below? As below, so above?)
I conclude that I have really suffered little. I’ve been afraid mostly, and most of my fear was around strange perceptions and the loneliness of having so little social support. And memories of events that might still terrorize me but are long past.
Ultimately, those discomforts have done something good for me. Simply, I now know (by experience, not by theory) that we live in a multi-dimensional universe, and I am a multi-dimensional being with an existence far beyond this one. I know that I have assistance on other realms. And more, but this is enough to share now.
In short: Don’t get stuck in fear. Don’t get stuck in black and white. Be true to yourself. Look inside. And look beyond this world. Don’t get stuck in the limiting mindset of this culture. Dream. Connect to your soul family. Be your best self. Have faith.
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Again, I think this might be my final post, in which I’ll sum up the meaning of my “Orange Alien” experience and place it in the context of my cosmology and spirituality.
I am now certain that the event was a mind control operation, either for testing my programming, updating the programming, installing new programming, or a combination.
I theorize that the initial electronic connection (I assume made via my implants which act as receivers) is what resulted in my being suddenly too agitated to lie still despite my exhaustion.
And the next part of the transmission provoked those images/sensations I interpreted as “beings” in my body. (There are theories that even “thought forms” can take life as “beings,” so my first interpretation of this is not all that unusual in the lore.)
I next sensed my “energy body” offset from my physical body which, when I focused on it, I interpreted as a lethargic shadow. I seemed hopeful that it was easy for me to move it away.
But what was it? My immobilized Self leaving? That wouldn’t be good (or maybe it’s what always happens in trauma and mind control). Or was it something else? I’m not sure.
The next sensation of the chaotic “little robot” bouncing around inside me I theorize was a visual interpretation of the energy of some programming. Since my Soul would resist programming, the energy would naturally “bounce around,” going haywire. It seemed I removed it, if not the programming, then maybe only my resistance.
The next image was of the tiny, primary orange, stereotypical “alien”-headed simple figure with a little stick body – very much like a cartoon.
Having read shamanic memoirs including experiences with the weirdest and simplest beings on other dimensions, I was willing to entertain the idea that this being could actually exist; however, after weeks of reflection, I’m more inclined to say the image was created with animation software and was induced as a visual experience as part of the mind control transmission, possibly to focus my attention and/or test my implant’s reception.
Next came the alien’s message, which began with concepts I’ve considered and do accept to some degree (supported by Sumerian history, Greek and Roman “mythology,” Judeo-Christian religious history, and critiques of evolutionary science):
The humans on Earth were created, and we’re being constantly taught, trained, tested, manipulated, chosen, judged, put to work/enslaved, genetically manipulated, selectively destroyed, etc. by beings (almost certainly more than one group, with differing agendas) who are sometimes worshipped, sometimes thought cruel, and regularly deemed to have motivations beyond our understanding. And they usually use “rulers” to do their bidding.
I find nothing problematic about this theory. I don’t “like” it, but as a theory, it explains a lot that “consensus reality” does not explain.
(The theory is problematic to the individual because of our American culture’s split-mindedness about it all – encouraging aspects of it through religion, while patently denying it in all other public arenas, particularly “education.”)
Continuing with the message: It seems that the creator Gods/gods/aliens intend to do away with their project/s fairly soon, probably saving some of their favored “stock,” which is typical scientific practice and coincidentally matches religious and historical prophesies.
And there are also benevolent beings on other dimensions, observing and noting the many wonderful humans here who have created much good and are worthy of saving. We witness the existence of these people, and it also matches prophesy.
Finally, to conclude the orange alien’s introduction, there is a big change coming, which we may experience as a catastrophe, but which will lead to a new era of history.
(Eras of history are pretty much ignored by American academia, but are taken for granted by many other cultures and sub-cultures, such as the tales of Atlantis, Lemuria, the Hopi’s [and other tribes’] “Third World” [Second, Fourth, etc], Sumerian account of the arrival of the Annunaki, etc.)
Life ends; new life begins.
The Apocalypse: The most feared event of Christian prophesy. But the real meaning of the word is: seeing or revelation.
Catastrophy will be the catalyst, while new life is born.
I don’t have a problem with this message.
What I have a problem with is “losing” the next 80 minutes and then getting up urgently to plug in a Monroe Institute recording to listen to.
Both these aspects smell like mind control. Carolyn named it, and I now agree.
It is my nature, however, to consider all possibilities calmly, taking my time, sometimes getting feedback from others, because it is my calling as a writer to document my process carefully, so that I can explain it to help others.
So I’ve weighed all possibilities, and it’s clear to me that the message could very well be “true” – in the sense that we can ever hope to speak “truth” about the cosmos in our very limited Earth languages.
Or, if it’s not true, then it was a message that someone knew I wouldn’t easily object to, (despite it’s delivery by an orange alien cartoon figure), and thereby could serve as an effective “hook” to get my attention for whatever followed.
And here’s the kicker: I don’t know what followed.
What do I do about missing time (80 minutes) and the probability of programming?
From what I’ve read, mind control technology is extremely complex and tricky or impossible to remove – if you can trust anyone and have enough money to pay them.
I have neither trust nor money, so I’m stuck with my own resources – like most in my situation.
Which brings me to spirituality.
Many readers know that I don’t follow any creed, but I trust an experience I had decades ago, in which I heard some of Christ’s teachings and, even though I was dumbfounded that these teachings were credited to the icon of mainstream American religion, for which I had no respect, I had an immediate whole-body reaction of affinity with His teachings.
It was not a rational judgement (any number of religions and philosophies present coherent teachings I can accept); this was a sense of recognizing, remembering, knowing something deep in my soul, as though written in my cells.
I’ve often summed up His teachings as the opposite of violence, materialism, racism, doctrinairism, and sexism. My immediate reaction was: I’m with Him!
I had no problem accepting that this teacher was my “Lord” (the authority or influence I gladly accept).
Today, I do not go to church (gives me the creeps), and I have no rituals. I simply try to live every aspect of my life by His basic teachings and “check in” regularly to talk – though I have a difficult time using the English pronunciation of the Greek translation of His Hebrew (Earth life) name, which reminds me of scamming preachers.
So I often commune wordlessly with Him, feeling my connection through the dimensions, acknowledging him a leader or major prophet-teacher of “my cosmic tribe.”
Why I jumped up to get the Monroe recording, rather than lie there and pray? I think because it was the first time I experienced such a terrifyingly high pitch ringing in my ears.
Maybe it also had a cosmic good purpose – to help me realize my weakness so I can be braver next time.
In any case, I am concerned that the controllers are still trying to work with me.
But I am confident about a few things too: I do not want to be their tool, and I intend to fight it and die fighting, even suffering if that’s what it comes to.
I intend to strengthen my spiritual life as we go deeper into these precarious times.
In the event that there will come a time when the dimensions will split the Earth experience into two or more futures, in which the controllers take their subdued stock, and the benevolent ones collect the mentally stronger members of their tribe, I pray I’ll been recognized.
In prayer that this is of service to you all,
Jean
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Thank you both for writing! Both of you personify different aspects of my own personal response.
While there were obviously clear “red flags,” as Caroline called them, I just don’t react emotionally or quickly anymore. Life has been busy and good, so I didn’t let this message change anything other than giving it a few hours to review it and post about it.
(Writing about things like this seems to be the role I’ve been given, as well as it being a strategy for protecting myself.)
I’ll respond mostly to Caroline, agreeing and disagreeing at points. I hope my example – open-eyed, calm, and thorough consideration – will be a useful example for others.
I’ll begin with a few disagreements and things I’d like to clarify, then address our agreements:
As for “contradictions,” I don’t have a problem with “contradictions,” as I believe they are a human philosophical problem. The fact that Life seems to require Death (read essays on the volvox and introduction of sexual reproduction and death in the evolution of life of Earth for background) is but one example.
Human language and philosophy lead us into some tricky territory, referred to contemporarily as “black and white thinking” and “polarizing issues,” constantly bogging down everything from parenting quandaries to Supreme Court decisions.
So, contradictions I accept as a fact of life; just because humans find something contradictory does not mean there’s a problem with anything but the human’s thinking.
No worry about craziness
Also, when I mentioned questioning Greg about whether he thought I was crazy, it was not because I thought I was; I just wanted to know whether he thought I might be. I did not doubt my sanity, only the possible “reality” of what I’d perceived. I know there are liars in this realm and the other realms, and just perceiving lies does not reflect anything about the perceiver, except that the person has perceived something.
I did not receive the “alien message” as simply placing “blame on humans.” I thought the message was clearly blaming those overseeing our genetic evolution – though both our perspectives are probably oversimplifications of a process which is more entwined and cooperative on some level.
Part of the message, after all, dealt clearly with other aliens controlling the leadership of planet Earth.
So the question remains: which faction of aliens this voice represented. He seemed to speak against the slave controllers, not for them.
I agree with Blue that we need to recognize that there are many races of beings we call aliens, and it is a cosmically-huge error to lump them all together under the one word.
He may have been a lying voice of the slave controllers, even though he was purporting to speak against them (“mixing truth and lies”). Or he may have been a dispassionate observer of the whole controller-slave history, and I just have a “problem with appearances.” I could argue both theories.
If this was a lie, and this race of beings is as suspect as many think, then I wonder if that means that my perception is finer than they trusted, for certainly if they had wanted to get through more convincingly to me, they would have prohibited or shielded that visual!
I really don’t understand, otherwise, why a false message, intended to deceive me, would come with that visual, unless they were careless liars and I had better vision than they anticipated.
If it’s a true message, then I’d have thought they’d have given me a screened visual rather than that displeasing alien face, unless they need for us to get over our human prejudices. (This is a primary question still intriguing me.)
The biggest “red flag” for me was feeling myself spiritually “outgunned.”
Certainly, we all want to feel in control at all times. We all want to believe that we can pray and get results when things get their worst – such as this moment, with the ringing in my ears escalated and was initiated by (apparently – though maybe it was only a screen image) a being who didn’t feel threatening but certainly had an image I don’t care for.
But having been through so much weirdness over the years, I can’t help but to have many times been so stumped by an experience that there was nothing to do but draw myself up for a larger, more philosophical viewpoint, to seek for answers from the whole of human experience:
For instance, haven’t humans – good humans – often made mistakes in judgement out of fear? Of course, and this encourages me to not jump to hasty conclusions, but to try always to be willing to jump back and forth between my personal experience (fear in many cases) and a higher philosophical perspective, try to integrate the two, and sometimes suspend judgement until I have more information.
And haven’t animals being treated for disease or other rescue attempts often struggled against their well-meaning human handlers?
So, even if I’m triggered by ear-ringing to act against my original instincts to do something I’ve avoided for years (listen to a Monroe recording), I try to look at the incident on as many levels as I can.
I certainly wanted the ringing to stop, but until that moment, I had not felt any fear regarding this strange being, only curiosity.
However, this paragraph of mine is very bothersome: “But only one idea seemed hopeful in that moment: a hypnotherapy recording for relaxation and sleep…. Was I being driven to chose this recording in order to program me? Or would this calm me? I hardly felt I had a choice. I plugged it in… and lay back on my pillow, melting into a submissive desire for anything to give me relief from the high-pitch whining…. I was fully aware, that I might now be being healed, comforted, and relaxed for sleep, or programmed – but felt unable to chose otherwise.”
Yeah. Very disturbing. But is it any different from what a white tiger getting surgery would experience? Do I necessarily conclude whatever happened had to be “evil”? No. But it’s possible.
Is it possible that something on that Monroe tape was actually good for my mind, as so many purport? Or was my initial judgment (of fear about it) the correct one, which was overridden? Another million-dollar question.
It’s certainly possible that my discernment was disabled by this event – a theory I promise not to neglect. But even if it was, I don’t believe it’s irreversible. In some ways, I feel like I’m getting a powerful lesson, like all humans, in the “knowledge of good and evil.” And I pray I survive the instruction.
The fact that I had a great day the next day also doesn’t necessarily mean that everything else associated with it is good.
As for the missing 80 minutes – which came before the ear-ringing episode – it’s curious, but neither good nor frightening in itself. It has happened before and has no relation to either good stuff or bad stuff in my life.
I know I’m practicing a degree of non-judgment that would be praised by some and condemned by some. I could defend it as scientific and philosophical good practice, but it could just as easily be mind control. I admit I’m doing it, whether “wise” or not.
I hope readers will appreciate my honesty and care in conveying exactly what I’m going through. That is one half my work, as a writer.
The other half of my purpose is to protect myself and others. If I let my community know what’s going on with me, then my local community and international readers will have more information with which to interpret any future weirdness, should mind controllers still be bothering with me. And that being that case, I hope I’ll be less useful to them – because I document – and less likely to be used.
All this is for each of you to decide on your own: Am I still being programmed, even somewhat successfully?
Or are attempts being made and I’m thwarting them, i.e., perceiving their image which they might otherwise have screened?
Or are there other beings from other dimensions trying to get new information through to us, which are just too obscure for us to understand yet, but eventually we’ll have enough pieces of the puzzle to break through?
You judge.
Peace, healing, and wisdom to us all.
I’m trying to write – even when I don’t understand, honestly – for all our Benefit,
Jean
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Background: This continues to be a wonderful year, probably the most wonderful of my life. Greg and I have eaten the most delicious, nutritious food of either of our lives, home-made together with joy. We have gardened, enjoyed the night sky, sung and performed successfully, and recently harvested cherries off a small tree in the yard and the first tomatoes of the season – a wonderful, simple life. I’ve often said – referring to a theory that the Earth is moving into an energy field that will separate people into various futures “by vibration” – that he and I have entered “the heaven stream.” Sure, I would love it if my neck and back hadn’t been “out of whack” off and on since mid-April, but I’m hoping my physical therapy will take care of that. So that’s the very positive context for this very weird event and – to me – shocking message I was given.
(I also want to remind readers that the multi-dimensional world is very well confirmed by science; and the vast populations of other-dimensional beings is well documented by ancient texts, religion, “mythology,” and folklore of every culture. It is only our modern American culture which makes perceiving these realities difficult. I know I’d have my inner and outer worlds better integrated if I lived in a less “civilized” tribe.)
In a way, this message shouldn’t be shocking to me, as I’ve entertained versions of this for years, and others have told similar stories. Still, I’m blown away to have heard it so clearly and powerfully, written it down, and recently felt called to post it. So, it is with a degree of discomfort that I follow through, trusting that it’s either true and useful to my readers, or will be useful to help us all understand eventually the nature of lies being fed to us by someone. You decide what this is:
June 22, 2012: Bad sleep the previous night, appearance of an odd bruise (photographed – and another photographed a few days earlier), and note in my journal, “Seems like stuff is happening” – my jargon for apparently other-dimensional intrusions in my life.
That evening, I was extremely tired, so I told Greg when we began to practice some of our music that as soon as the urge hit, I was going straight to bed. He promised to help by being as quiet as he could. When I retired to sleep at 8:30, he went outside to play his guitar and sing quietly in the dusk, fading light, and dark – til 10 pm.
Unable to sleep
I found myself adjusting and readjusting the covers, my pillow, and my body’s position for a minute or two, wondering why I was now so filled with energy. (Strange, but not uncommon when “things” happen.)
THE VISION: Event 1 – A Shadow
Suddenly I realized that I wasn’t feeling centered on my pillow – because my energy body seemed not to be centered in my physical body – it seemed offset to the left by about four inches!
As I tried to psychically pull myself together, I realized that the energy on my side was shadowy. Later, I’d wonder if the shadowy thing had been an intruder entering or a wounded part of me ready to leave, but at the time, I only perceived that it didn’t have much will to stay, so I wordlessly, psychically lifted it off, quite easily, gathered it up, and handed it off to angelic helpers. This seemed to take less than one minute, perhaps only seconds.
Event 2 – A Small, Robotic-like Being
Returning my perceptions to my body, intending to focus on relaxation, I next perceived an energetic little robot-like being the size of a pencil eraser, like a tin can in appearance with wiry arms and legs, bouncing around inside me chaotically.
Surprised, but able to turn to “shamanic” training to keep my cool, I swept him up rather easily and handed him off too. What did he represent?? I hadn’t the faintest idea. This, too, lasted less than one minute, perhaps only seconds.
Event 3 – A LIttle, Orange, Alien-headed Stick Figure
Hoping that my energy would then be clear and I could go to sleep, I suddenly “saw” inside my head another tiny being perched in the center, midway between my ears, leaning over an orange bar that spanned the space between my inner ears!
My description of his appearance should not be taken literally, as a human brain acculturated to the “normalcies” of this Earth, cannot easily or clearly perceive things in other realms without “translating” them into more familiar terms matching this reality. This is why Native American prophets could only describe huge, silver flying “birds” (we now know as planes) and “giant spiderwebs” crossing the continent (phone and electrical wires).
Beyond the perceptual and linguist problem of translating visions of technology across hundreds of years, the problem of perceiving and describing experiences translated across different dimensions, of course, results in even greater distortions.
So please take my description with a few generous shakes of salt; I sense that my brain was overwhelmed, simply not hardwired to translate this sort of thing to contemporary American concepts, and needed to simplify – or else the being/s I spoke with created a very simple (and to my rational mind an embarrassingly simple) visual image to hold my attention.
In any case, I “saw” a tiny, half-inch high, stereotypically large-eyed, pointy-chinned “alien”-headed being with a stick-figure, primary orange in color – inside my head. My attention was fixed for what seemed like a couple of minutes, but was apparently engaged for much longer.
My rational mind immediately took stock: This was not my imagination. I’d been wide awake and still felt very much awake. My body and bed still felt very much there and related to each other tangibly. And everything was far too clear and events were moving way too fast and in directions I could never have anticipated or imagined. It did not feel like a dream, so I concluded I was having another extra-dimensional experience, which I sometimes called shamanic.
I was very surprised, even dismayed, by the cliche image, but it felt very compelling, not fearsome, so I let go this socially-driven assessment (of cliches and embarrassment) and turned my attention to it. (This rationally checking in took about two seconds, I’d guess.)
(Total perceived time since I lay down [I made notes about the experience, including my perceptions of time, immediately after the full experience]: about 4 minutes.)
The being looked directly at me and began communicating intently, at least partly in words (or else my brain translated his thoughts placed directly in my head).
At major junctures, he seemed to refer briefly to ideas I’d already entertained and then built on them.
The gist of his message was this: Those ideas you’ve been entertaining are right: Humans are a flawed design, but don’t feel bad about it, because so is everything.
Everything evolves and gets better. Nearly everything on your plane of life “goes extinct” in its various forms eventually.
It’s not a tragedy because everything also continues to live. It’s all how you look at it.
The genetics still exists. For instance, we can recreate the mammoth if we want. And some humans will survive, just not all of you as individuals.
The ending of an era is not a cause for grief. It’s just a fact of evolution. We’ll keep the best of you and recycle the rest.
There are a few reasons for this. One, the Earth needs to heal from the damage you’ve caused, just like a garden needs to have its spent plants turned under to replenish the soil. It’s not so much a time for grief, but for rest and renewal.
But it’s a little more urgent than that. The second reason for the transition is that your race is endangering not just life on Earth, but the stability of many adjacent dimensions with many other beings in them. We’ve done damage control around your war-making since the 1940s, but for the most part your race continues to get more destructive and dangerous. So, it’s a matter of self-protection on our part.
Third, genetic selection is our work.
Your race, as a whole, is clearly too violent and greedy, driven by excessive emotions. We’ve sent prophets to try to teach you to control your flaws, and we’ve even made genetic changes over the eons, but the emotional factors keep re-emerging and do a lot of damage.
The result of this violence of one human against another is that the majority of individuals are starving, poisoned, or psychologically damaged and are not healthy.
Many of you think the destruction can and should be prevented by “god” or “aliens,” but cycles of destruction and new creation are a fact of life on Earth. They have been described and foretold in every culture and time, so it should be understood. It only comes as a surprise to some because your culture relegated these stories to barely-tolerated “mythologies” which few have taken seriously.
No one will “burn in hell.” All will be recycled, just as all life on Earth has always been.
Some souls will return to the Creator-Mother-Father-Source to emerge in new forms, while others with enough soul integrity will evolve as some manifestation of their current selves – according to the integrity of their souls. This is not quite a Judgement Day as depicted by many religions, but simply a sorting out of what things are – the wheat separated from the tares, to use Christian imagery.
Some of your genetics will evolve. Those whose genetics have allowed them to live without excess greed or violence may continue to evolve in human-like bodies, some adapted to realms beyond Earth.
In addition, many of you have already been having your genetic material harvested (in activities you’ve called “abductions”) throughout your lives, which means that you have been chosen as genetic forebears of entire new races – though most of you have been unaware of it.
While we admire and have selected you for your genetics, many of you have objected to being treated like “breeding stock,” as if that’s a lowly thing, to be compared to cattle. This betrays your arrogance that has been part of the human problem. “All is God,” as many have said, including cattle, and you. It has been unfortunate that most of your leaders and teachers haven’t respected the whole of Creation and so you’ve looked down on and mistreated cattle.
Some of you also haven’t liked being kept amnesic when we took you to harvest sperm and eggs, but ours was a large operation, and many of those who have written critically about their treatment have not understood that when we did try to explain our program to a few humans, they were often very upset by the information, as it didn’t fit into their existing reality. Occasionally, when some human seemed able to handle the information, we dropped the amnesia bit by bit and shared as much as the person could handle. Often, it wasn’t much. And then when the information was accepted, if the person tried to share it, he or she was usually socially ostracized and suffered for that. So it never seemed worth indulging human curiosity. We’re sorry you took offense.
So while some of your progeny will survive as humans, a vaster number will be hybrid human-aliens, as you say, though this word alien is a major misconception.
The human has been a hybrid alien for a very long time. And we are all hybrids, from almost the beginning of time. So this hybrid program is not an affront to your sovereignty, as some would say. This is simply a continuing process of evolution. Life continues on as it always has. And all life is “sacred”: the worm, the cattle, the human, we overseers (your creators in a sense), and your hybrid progeny.
Apocalypse, you know, means revealing or unveiling – which is coming soon for everyone. Apocalypse does not mean catastrophe, but catastrophe will cause the apocalypse or time of seeing. People will require the “catastrophe” to wake to the larger reality of their existence. Chaos has always evolved those with more potential. This is because people can’t see or act when they are too comfortable or uncomfortable.
On your planet, the greed-inducing and fear-inducing rulers kept their populations in one of these states at all times, through economic pressures and rewards, but also by using other tools of control: entertainment, laws, prisons, education, chemicals, etc. For instance, most of the population, stressed economically into a state of bad health, is unable to respond when they sense a larger reality, and they generally chose to hypnotize themselves into quiet passivity. Others chose not to respond, distracted by the luxury of so many entertainments. Occasionally, when the balance of control mechanisms shifts enough to allow a population to rebel, rulers respond with prison and various tortures which drive the people back into silence.
Obviously, it’s not a pretty picture. It’s been directed by beings – not humans, but using human rulers as functionaries – who use human tendency to violence and are corrupting the potential of the human race, and thereby endangering dimensions beyond this Earth plane. It’s time for us to intervene.
For this reason, as we have explained to your “experiencers” or “abductees” many times, we have every right to protect ourselves and to remove our selected genetic stock and other planetary resources from the Earth before the catalyzing event. And it’s “for your own good,” though we know many will indignantly reject this. The alternative of protecting or rescuing the current regime, given that so few humans are given the opportunity to live meaningful lives and the whole planet and other dimensions are threatened, is simply not feasible. It’s time to clear the slate – the time of “harvest,” as Yeshua called it.
This message, not word-for-word, but delivered concept-by-concept, seemed to last just a few minutes at most.
Then I saw between my inner ears the orange bar the alien stood behind had four tabs rising up along its uppermost surface, evenly spaced across it. They were not fixed, as the tiny being pressed one tab forward, then another and another, till all four lay horizontally, top edges aimed toward my view.
Ears ringing
When the fourth tab lay down, the ringing in my ears, which I’ve endured almost non-stop since November 2010, rose quickly to a volume just below my threshold of tolerance. With no small amount of anxiety, I immediately sought to stop it, first by “interior” action. But before I could act, I saw a spot in the tissue of my brain seeming to melt into a small crater.
My reaction to this is interesting to me now. On a rational level, I was shocked: a hole in the brain is not considered a good thing. On the other hand, I also know that the brain can heal, and when an old psychic wound dissolves, it can be healing, releasing lifelong phobias, hatreds, or other dysfunctionalities. I’ve also experienced my own “splits” heal as I’ve aged and then read theories that this comes (counter-intuitively) with natural aging deterioration. I also have a friend whose cruel father became gentle and sweet after a stoke. So part of me withheld judgement and simply watched in interest – after all, I was experiencing this entire vision non-judgmentally as, maybe, simply a metaphor, maybe a lie, best to take calmly, not fearfully. Finally, I’ve also known that my mind has been the receptacle for my programming, and thought that perhaps that melting away might be of some of that. And I’ve been having my “mind blown” for years, often resulting in broader visions of reality.
Besides, I couldn’t think rationally about anything because the ringing in my ears demanded attention. I began to pray and quickly felt myself “outgunned.” Other actions crossed my mind in an instant: energy work, shamanic ritual, sitting up to meditate and pray. But only one idea seemed hopeful in that moment: a hypnotherapy recording I had for relaxation and sleep.
I had just that week attempted to synchronize the recordings (mostly music) on my computer with my iPhone, and I hoped that a specific recording for sleep was on my phone. In the past year, I’d used an iPod – now not functioning – many nights for getting to sleep, plugging it into small speakers that reached to both ends of my pillow, so that part of the set-up was still in place; I just didn’t know if this piece of sleep help had made it to the iPhone. I retrieved it, turned it on, discovered my desired recording was not there, but there were four other hypnotherapy recordings to choose from. Three were for waking states which I didn’t want. Only one was a relaxation recording – but it was part of a Monroe Institute sales presentation I’d never listened to fully, afraid that it might contain mind control programming!
Having avoided recordings like these for years, despite intense interest in all they promised, I was now faced with a dilemma: to trust or not to trust. The ringing in my ears continued at such a pitch that I was very close to panic. Was I being driven to chose this recording in order to program me? Or would this calm me? I hardly felt I had a choice. I plugged it in (as I heard Greg enter and begin rummaging in the kitchen) and lay back on my pillow, melting into a submissive desire for anything to give me relief from the high-pitch noise.
I thought I’d skip past the sales part as soon as I’d gotten comfortable, but as soon as I’d done that, I found the recording so relaxing that I didn’t want to lift my head and search for the transition point in the recording. Besides, the sales talk was done respectfully and seemed interesting. I lay there, thinking it mildly humorous that I was listening to a sales pitch at a time like this, smelling popcorn wafting in from the next room, especially when, for at least a decade, I’ve avoided, for fear of subliminal programming from exactly such recordings as this. I was fully aware, that I might now be being healed, comforted, and relaxed for sleep, or programmed – but felt unable to chose otherwise.
As much as I wanted to be a strong warrior, it seemed impossible not to submit. Ralph Blum, in his Book of Runes, described “timely retreat” and submission as a skill of the spiritual warrior, and I accepted that this must be a time for it now. I also knew that while Geronimo chose to fight to the death, and Cochise chose to surrender, both leaders had been outgunned. Cochise had just accepted it sooner. I felt like Cochise, sad, but accepting.
My body relaxed and I noticed the sales pitch had come to an end. I had no idea when the high pitch had ended. Interesting, soothing sounds from the recording rolled into and out of my awareness in waves, until I lost consciousness or slept – it seemed, within twenty seconds (the recording, though, actually played for about ten minutes). I was out for the night.
The next morning I woke up refreshed and feeling wonderful.
I told Greg all I could remember before writing it down, and he listened, unruffled. Occasionally I tested him, asking his opinion of various aspects, hoping he didn’t think I was crazy. He assured me that, even though he doesn’t perceive these things, he fully believes in this sort of cosmic complexity and trusts my perceptions and my intellectual self-questioning and conclusions.
Lost time
Then he mentioned having been outside, playing his guitar and singing, for an hour and a halfbefore he came inside to make popcorn. My perception, though, was that all that had transpired until his entrance had seemed like ten minutes.
Thoughts about my failures to respect my own shamanic perceptions
I also returned to a major concern I’ve had about myself for a few years – making me wonder and worry how many times I might be re-taught certain “shamanic” lessons, the first ones (“kindergarten” I call it) being awareness, discernment, and protection. I’ve had the awareness for a long time but have worried (stupidly) that if I don’t have social credibility, then my efforts to write will be for naught. I explained more about kindergarten to Greg:
“It’s dangerous to be unaware, especially if one has a propensity for slipping over the edge into other dimensions – and I do that, or get dragged there.
“The second lesson is that some beings are allies, and some must be protected against, and we have to know the difference – that is discernment.
“The third component is protection from the problem beings.
“After that, one can focus on communication with the allies, but I am not sure I’ve even begun there. If I have, then I guess I’m amnesic for it – but that’s could just be hopeful thinking – unless my allies are keeping me amnesic for a positive purpose, which I think sometimes I understand, but again, this might just be hopeful.
“Mostly I think I’ve been a bad shamanic initiate. Again, I’ve excused myself with the idea that being a writer and communicator means I have to make sure that no one thinks that I’m crazy, or my communicating will be all for naught. So I’ve denied my own impulses many times, for the benefit of credibility, thinking it’ll all be worthwhile one day when I’m able to communicate across the gulfs of differing paradigms – which causes me to take these risks of forgetting my own spiritual perceptions sometimes.
“I feel as though I have always known I was taking this calculated spiritual risk, forgetting or ignoring my larger reality in the hopes I’d remember later and be better able to communicate about about it then to people who would believe me. But maybe this has just been an excuse I told myself to feel better about neglecting the perceptions that set me apart. And all the while I’ve been writing about not being in denial! And the result is that I’ve risked my soul lessons in protection and discernment. And now I don’t know the meaning of my ringing ears, implants, and night-time events of amnesia. Did all this happen because I didn’t learn my lessons to protect myself, or would it have happened anyway?
“The bottom line is that I’ve been a reluctant “shamanic initiate” and now – I assume because of this – I don’t know what the hell’s going on.
“When the volume was turned up in my ears, I couldn’t pray it away and just ran for a recording with who-knows-what on it!”
Experiencers often talk about “alien” technology used to induce cooperation. Perhaps no “warrior” response is possible under those conditions, except to submit. Enough of my spiritual regrets.
Assessment of the Message
First, I suspect: Was the message I received lies? Told by predators to prey? (Philosophically, I have to ask all questions.)
Or is a true description of Life and evolution? It feels true, and I’ve thought it before. Sometimes living beings really do have no choice but to submit and/or die. And every hero throughout time has been described in events when they were captured or put under a spell, immobilized until rescued, and eventually they did leave this Earth plane.
So I don’t feel too bad about submitting to the event and even believing the message.
My next day was extremely productive. My pain since mid-April, and especially the last few days, was mostly abated. And I accomplished everything I had hoped to accomplish – and more.
Final thoughts
Many times I’ve wondered about Machaelle Small-Wright’s account (in Dancing in the Shadow of the Moon) of going back and forth, daily, to other realms, requiring lots of “body work” to handle the physical/spiritual shifts, including work to align her body, which resulted in neck and back pain. Could that be why my back and neck hurt so badly and explain the origin of my spine problem (otherwise unknown)?
I also have to repeat how grieved I am that I keep this major aspect of my life a secret and pretend socially that it’s insignificant. This pretense has a personal effect, and I fail to take the time to communicate with my Relations in the other dimensions with any discipline, almost as if saying: My Help knows where I am if they want to talk to me. Way too casual and dismissive. If I were one of my Relations, I’d be disappointed in me.
Maybe I’m somewhat afraid still, because my meditation attempts have for years been intruded upon by beings who don’t look like angels, but instead like aliens whom I want very much to avoid. I guess that’s my excuse: Having been invited into these trans-dimensional realities, I’ve been turned off by the beings I found there (was I only turned off because of entertainment disinformation?), and so I’ve remained just a little too ignorant to know how to assess this experience – at least with much confidence. I do have a personal opinion, but am not willing to say for certain what it means.
Overall, this last year has been wonderful – the best year I could have designed for myself on Earth. Nevertheless, I feel very ready to leave this planet. I accept that the Earth is threatened by the human condition, and other-dimensional beings are threatened by it too. And the some of those others are like gardeners, ready to plow things under, as is appropriate at the end of the season.
The amazing things that we’ve created will continue in another dimension or place: our music and art. And the technology was never really “ours,” but was given to us, so of course it will continue elsewhere too.
I don’t know if human futures will include going only into other dimensions, or if some possibilities might include continuing on a peaceful Earth. I’ve imagined this latter, hoping for it and preparing myself and others for it, but maybe it won’t be. I have no way of saying for certain, of course. I just keep having this feeling (not always, but sometimes) of going away soon – and feeling fine about it. It reminds me of the flashback I had in 1999 of leaving the Pleiades: there was a touch of melancholy, but mostly a positive anticipation of new things to come. For most of my life I’ve imagined and wished for a different society in which sharing is the norm, and creation of good for all is the primary activity, and fear is only a moment’s reaction, disappearing as all focus on a creative resolution. “There are more things in heaven and earth…than are dreamt of in your philosophy.” I do believe this.
Now it’s time for us to look and see – the meaning of apocalypse.
Here we go….
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We – everyone in the human race – are being manipulated by “aliens,” but this is not news.
Our alien connection is not only ancient, it is intrinsic to whom we are: created beings, managed, DNA-manipulated, civilized, experimented on, mind controlled, and more, much as we treat other animals.
The primary question about our manipulations by these “aliens,” manipulations which are too many to describe in this short essay, is: Are our creators benevolent? (Or not?)
Religious history, with its commands to murder and torture, leads me to conclude: often not. (Some would say never, but I won’t go there: It’s fatalistic and, as Rob Brezny has said, “boring.”)
If the answer, then, is “Sometimes they’re on our side, and sometimes they’re not,” it behooves us to develop skills to intuitively read another being’s energy or motives. (We probably once had that skill and have lost it, but that’s another essay.)
Another important corollary is the aliens’ relationship with our governments. Since historical texts of all the world’s cultures and religions describe tight relationships between beings from the stars and human rulers, we should consider this is likely still the case.
To check it out, we can look at our own government and realize it has been officially denying for decades what every other culture on the planet has taken for granted since the beginning of history, which even a majority of Americans (the population with the lowest level of extra-terrestrial awareness in the world) knows is true: our government lies.
We all learn eventually that denial and ridicule are often signs of deceptive communications. And our government’s lies are so obvious, it should be embarrassing, but we all just play along and don’t challenge them.
The common argument that they’ve been keeping it from us for our own good (so we won’t get hysterical) or because they’re embarrassed that they don’t have control and can’t protect us is highly ironic. Our culture’s main religious text tells us in the last book: The “first” [world nations?] shall be last. [To know?]
How do government spokes folks and everyone else keep a straight face about all the lies?
Mind control?
Most people, in national government or on your own street, have been well-trained to be polite, avoid talking about politics and religion, obey their conditioning, and pretend that they don’t see that our rulers lie about pretty much everything.
When we accept the command not to speak, it’s unbearable unless we choose not to think about it either; and if we choose not to think about it, we generally tend not to perceive it. In our silence, we blind ourselves.
Governments throughout history have reported similar patterns of alien-human interaction, while our government proclaims no pattern exists; but it displays all the signs of lying. Conclusion: our government is lying about aliens, and maybe also abductions.
It’s safe to say that aliens are either in bed with our government, working with our government cooperatively, working with our government coercively, or are the government – the shadow government perhaps. And perhaps all those relationships are true with different aliens.
And if other cultural and religious histories are true, we can’t even use the word alien honestly, except to indicate that they are strange because we don’t know them – but we don’t know ourselves! We don’t even know where we came from (at least Americans don’t). With our long history of having our genetics blended with aliens’, I’m not sure we can say that we aren’t all half alien ourselves.
So, the distinction between alien abductions and government abductions may be no distinction at all, except in our immature understanding of our world.
Next essay: Is government complicity with aliens something to fear? It sometimes feels that way. But it may not be necessarily. Stay tuned.
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My life is exquisitely difficult to talk about. It’s woven with extreme themes – sexual abuse, mind control, aliens, mysticism – and with accomplishments that make me shy, and failures that embarrass me, and critical facts that embarrass other people.
My lottery ticket to this crazy life may have been as simple as my birth date. I was born on a Full Moon, on a Monday (Moon Day), in the middle of Cancer, also known as Moon Child.
So were the numbers: I was born on July 7, 1952 − 5+2 adding up to 7. Three sevens. Then my mother gave me a name with 7 letters: Jean Ann.
on the day of my birth. The next day, the local paper would give my birth a short column to remark on the coincidence.
In my 20s, I became an activist for peace, and later for social justice, and environmental sustainability. Along the way, I insulted the FBI with media releases exposing their most incriminating statements which I sent to 600 major media around the world, nearly every day of the 6-week “Judi Bari v FBI” federal trial – and the FBI was found guilty.
Perhaps they amped up my MK again when I published my book. And maybe they amped it up again each time I published a particularly hard-hitting blog or video. There seem to be correlations.
So activists (like I used to be) often beat our heads on the wall trying to communicate with politicians as if those others were operating from a human viewpoint, perhaps just skewed in a way that compelling information can correct. (Wrong. If they’re human, they’re beholden to and controlled by the Others.)
So, the idea that beings from other dimensions or planets seem to be a lot like us – greedy, conniving, lying, willing to inflict pain and discomfort – shouldn’t be received as if it were outlandish. On the contrary, we should call it normal, as it’s exactly like us! Maybe we even learned these negative traits from their treatment of us.
Interestingly, opening our eyes to the hidden reality (seeing past the Big Lie) is the meaning of the word apocalypse – now laden with images of horror – not because that’s what the word means, but because it’s probably what must eventually come from millennia of our ignorance before we wake up and see.
Reptilians, even though until they became conscious to me, I’d thought the tales were unfortunate disinformation meant to discredit the whole field regarding aliens. I’ve also seen over a dozen UFO’s, sometimes with others as witnesses.
Part 1 begins here (only 14 minutes): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6eXqotol1s
