Tag Archives: CIA

Morgellon’s, Fungus, and Cancer

Research has led me to one site that links Morgellon’s to, not only strange, colorful fibers, but also a fungus-like growth called “biofilm,” with plastic properties, which covers the skin.  It is extremely strong, does not look like skin, and I cannot remove it.

One writer called it part of a “cyborgian” evolution the Controllers of the Planet are technologically enforcing on us, with some of their former subjects now being used as first test subjects for this.  Crazy, huh?

I was trying to remove the film with dermabrasives, enzymes, baking soda, and vinegar; nothing works.  It’s like I have plastic all over me.

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Biofilm? – covers my face and seems to be beginning to “shine” all over me, reflecting light when photographing, as if my skin were plastic).

It doesn’t show to the naked eye, and seems to be a matrix for other things growing through it.

Fungus on the skin leads to cancer – according to another author – and some of cancer images I found online look like some of the thousands of weird things I’ve photographed on me, like these little red raspberries, which the site identified as a “fast-growing” cancer, and which I’ve photographed about six times on my scalp.  Hmmmm.  [A glitch in cyborg design to kill their product?]

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I’ve spent lots of money on supplements and herbs and organized it all into a daily routine.  I’ve always kept sugar to a tiny fraction of the standard American diet, but – it’s weird – I’ve been craving it.  I recall I’d read long ago that microorganisms can actually convince our brains that we need something like sugar, and so I’ve been struggling with that – so yesterday I emptied most of the sugar out of the camper and gave it away.

I’m scrubbing (as much as I have energy for) and sunning (when the weather’s good and I’m feeling well), and praying (when I “can”), but I am not certain I’m getting better.

I can’t get help from the medical establishment because doctors don’t want to talk about this “controversial” disease.  Why?  Well, history says doctors have often been involved in top-secret experiments, and they certainly act like it now.

Each one who learns I have a digital microscope and can record my photos and watch my progress has seemed a little perturbed, as if now they know they can’t bullshit me in the usual way.  No one yet, MD or ND, has acted normal, except for the one who honestly said, “This stuff scares me.  I need to refer you out.”  So.

Yesterday the News announced that hospitals across the nation are now short-staffed and their space overwhelmed, and so all other medical care will be compromised – and for example they mentioned people with chronic diseases – like cancer.

Is this whole thing designed to execute Kissinger’s prophetic statement about our world needing a 95% die-off?

So they invented something to mostly kill the old and infirm.  Strategically, that would make sense and be a good start.  Better than war.  Plague.

I’m over sixty, so Kissinger would have me die.  No doctor will give me a blood test to begin any internal treatment.  So, I’m wondering if I’m supposed to go soon.

Screen Shot 2020-04-05 at 9.05.40 PM.pngI’m in the pristine, pure desert though!  Only have to spend a couple hours in town, one trip each week, to empty my tanks, shower, get water, buy groceries, maybe visit the library, then back to the desert to relax and watch the birds.

And scrub, prepare good food, take my medicines, rub stuff on me, enjoy camp mates from a distance, enjoy solitude, and wonder if I’m really supposed to try to heal this biofilm and fibers and spirochetes.

(So daunting!  They’re elated to syphilis! – shades of the syphilis experiment they did for a decade on the Black men of Tuskeegee – the experiment for which the government was shamed into finally admitting and paying settlements.  At it again, this time with activists.)

And keep on trying to heal myself as a mind control subject too?  Sheesh.

YeshivaOr (that was just one alter talking) heal myself through prayer?  Ask Jesus to heal me?  (I have been.)

Maybe this is when I’ll be pushed to such absolute lows that I’ll trigger some strength or knowing and transform myself into something new, spiritual, and healed – ?

Seems like a pretty big order for an old lady, which I’m really beginning to feel these days, grunting and huffing sometimes just to move around.

Feels like, if Kissinger wants 95% to die, I can’t think of much of a reason to say it shouldn’t be me.  Ya know?

But I’ll definitely ask that friends and family keep me out of the hospitals!  Away from doctors!  But let my friends with healing talents come sit with me, help me deal with pain.

The deadly part of this disease is the spirochetes.  (That’s why I’ve been so focused on getting a blood test.)  They invade the brain, nervous system, and heart.  I hope the heart is attacked first.

But if it’s my brain, we’ll have other issues, and I pray for everyone’s kindness, and again to be kept away from doctors or anyone who could be pretending to help but really be another targeter.

That’s why, for awhile, I was thinking the coronavirus might be a faster way to go.  But I’m not chasing it – and I no longer believe it’s actually a virus causing the problem. And I don’t believe I’ll live or die according to what I do; I believe my controllers will decide.

Further, I am not philosophically persuaded that I understand everything in this multi-dimensional world well enough to make that sort of radical decision, to die or not.  When my angels or family and friends over there make themselves known to me and call me over, then maybe.

Till then, I’ll sit in the beautiful desert or forest, greet the trees and flowers and birds each day, and move when the weather persuades me.

My YouTube channel has videos of my Morgellon’s at:

https://youtu.be/TsfzsdnczsA

 

Isolation in Weirdness

Morgellon’s Disease can be painfully isolating – but I’m used to isolation. I’m a mind control subject, and the controllers have always planned for us to be isolated and discredited – in case we’d ever remember what had been done to us.

Since I was a child, my mother has been telling my siblings not to believe me, and while I witnessed her behavior all my life, I’d been programmed to never object to it or anything else my parents might do.

They were being paid, I believe, to cooperate with the controllers with whom they’d contracted when I was a baby, living with them in student housing on the campus of UC Davis where the Human Ecology Project was launched in my first year, a cover for mind control experiments.

My mother created a lot of disharmony between me and my siblings. When they wouldn’t eat all their vegetables, she’d point to me – cruelly mind controlled to obey regardless of my desire – and say, “Why don’t you just eat your dinner like Jean Ann?” and they’d all scowl at me across the table.

Another phase I heard from her often was, “Oh, I’ve always said you had a vivid imagination, and you mixed up your dreams with memory.” Weirdly, she always said the exact same words, never varied, in a sing-song rhythm, so that one day it made the hair stand up on the back of my neck when I realized she seemed to be going into a trance when she repeated the sentence word-for-word, and in that moment I knew something was very, very weird.

I’d just drawn the floor plan of an apartment in which I had my youngest memory, including details about where the linoleum ended and the carpet began and the glazed tall narrow window by the front door – to which she’d exclaimed, “You couldn’t remember that! You were 14 months old when we left there!” Then her face had trembled at the illogic of her words, and she pushed herself up from the table, walked to the window, and said those same words once more.

The memory I’d described rather thoughtlessly (I’d started enthusiastically before realizing it didn’t put her in a very good light but then I had to continue, so I de-emphasized the difficult part) had been of me fussing for her attention, batting around her hips (I was that small), her frustrated response as she stopped her efforts over the stove, threw the spatula, and screamed, “I can’t take this anymore! I’m leaving!” and walked out the door.

My next youngest memory of my mother was of her “washing my mouth out with soap” for something I’d said.  I have no idea what it was, but I suspect the thing that enraged her was talking about some sexual abuse in the night.  I was so obedient to my mother that after she left me in the bathroom, I followed her, prodding my tongue over chunks of soap stuck to my teeth and my mouth filling with saliva, to get permission to move the step stool so I could spit it all out.

Later, when my baby sister was born, I recall being told to keep my two younger siblings from getting into trouble when my mother took the baby in to nap with her. I was only five and felt burdened to keep two little ones from getting into things they shouldn’t.  Of course, they didn’t want to listen to me, and things didn’t always go well.  But I still have no memories of my mother’s face or her looking at me.

Today, when I describe anything weird to my siblings, they all ignore me in a similar way; they respond to everything “normal” and are absolutely silent about everything else, even the most extreme.

Once, after I’d woken with a Taser burn on my arm, my face looking as bad as I’ve ever seen it, and my physical energy totally drained for days, I crafted a letter to my siblings and edited it for three days until I thought I had something that was as brief as possible, but still well-documented, limited to what I thought they could handle, with a conclusion simply asking for their advice in addressing this common weirdness in my life, of waking with weird injuries and total exhaustion.

Two of my three siblings responded with one sentence each. My brother would pray for me; my older younger sister said she didn’t have any money to lend (I never mentioned money); and my youngest younger sister just didn’t respond.

Years earlier, I’d learned that all my family had met together without me for a special long weekend at the family cabin, and I was never told the nature of the meeting.  I assume they all decided to do something like I’ve heard is done in mental health cases: only respond to what’s “real”; ignore what’s “not real.”  I understand.  Mom did her job well, and my siblings simply believe I’m somewhat crazy.

That’s not really a problem. I could always just live my life without communicating with my siblings.  But one sibling will be executing the family estate one day, and my father’s will has some strange language about money NOT going to anyone who can’t care for him- or herself; and if my brother – who has, as a fundamentalist Christian, chosen to act very hostilely to me in the past, including telling me I’m not in touch with reality as he walked away, waving his hand as if to shoo away any words back from me) – actually believes I’m crazy, then I might get ZERO inheritance – unless I go live in an institution!

So I continue to treat my situation like a good scientist, and document, document, document.  I have photos, testimonies, medical records, police records, and more.  But my siblings want to hear of nothing; they want to continue to pretend I’m crazy, and no sexual abuse or mind control has had anything to do with our family.

Never mind that our family has connections to Masons, Mormons, the Military, and Hollywood.  And one sister hired Madonna’s mother to be nanny to her baby daughter!

One other way I could interpret my siblings’ behavior is that they’re more knowledgeable than they let on, and they know our parents were involved and that I was given into mind control, but it’s best to pretend they don’t know, because it has always been in everyone’s best interests to protect our father (and mother, who passed away last year).

Or maybe it’s to protect themselves.  Maybe they’re also in on it somehow.  Maybe they became Satanists at some point, willfully or accidentally.  Or maybe there’s some other reason.

I choose to believe they were simply encouraged from their earliest years by my mother and father to disbelieve me – because the controllers know that their experiments are not fully refined, and their subjects often “glitch” and realize the weirdness or pain of their lives and want to tell someone.  So to head off that possibility, their subjects are called crazy or not dependable from their earliest days to everyone close to them.

The world tells me I have a good mind; I’ve scored high on college exams, Air Force exams (I never joined), and MENSA tests (also never joined).   I’ve been offered two six-figure salaries; and in college received comments from three professors that my analyses were the most astute and creative that they’d read in their careers.

Last week, one of my sisters learned about the harsh treatment of migrants in our border jails, and I wrote back to say I wasn’t surprised because of how I’d been treated in jail as an activist.  It involved being Tasered and losing 24 hours of memory.  She ignored me.

The sad part is my family and exes seems to have also convinced my daughter to distrust me too.  My son I’ve chosen not to tell much to, so he’s the only positive “real” connection, but I haven’t had the courage to actually be real, lest he turn away also.

So I live with NO acknowledgement of my reality or the pain or anxiety I suffer, except from random friends now and then who’re dealing with something similar.

I worry about my family.  I’d like to protect my kids and granddaughter and some of my nieces and nephews, but the mind controllers have been plotting for decades to keep exactly this from happening.

So I live philosophically.  Each of us has their own lessons to learn, and no one can help another learn them.  We can support and encourage and love, but ultimately we can’t help.

We have our own spiritual Helpers though, and so I pray for my children and grandchildren, and even my siblings and father and mother on the other side, and my nieces and nephews – that their Helpers are doing what’s possible, and I don’t need to worry.  It’s sad, though, never having had siblings to whom I could relate normally.

I’ve enjoyed that sense of family when I’ve connected with the other side.  It’s not very often though, at least that I remember.

I don’t blame anyone.  We’re all mind controlled to some degree, and some of us with the worst of it can see it better and sooner; those who can’t see it have every reason not to look: it’s scary.  I don’t blame them for looking away.

I’m sure life would be delightful if I could pretend this stuff wasn’t real and “make it real,” and I tried that for ten years.  But after a decade of denial, throwing all my life energy into other activities, they were always sabotaged and brought down by mysterious forces, either working in me or working through others.

So I accept that my eyes and ears and good mind are right; I’m mind controlled.  And those around me have been mind controlled to ignore what I’d like to tell them.

I respect mind control.  It’s next to impossible to combat.  At least I can’t, yet.  So I can’t blame others for turning their backs on me.

Hopefully, we’ll talk about it in the afterlife.

You were Born into a Sci-fi Scenario

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Inside my ear canal (never approved by me)

What do you do when you wake up and realize you were born into a science fiction scenario, and everyone has conspired to lie about it and tell you you’re not too be taken seriously, despite your science journals and other “documentation,” and they want you to just shut up about this stuff?

You’d been fairly successful in living your life as if everything were normal, even though you knew it wasn’t. You lived in an uneasy tension between 2 worlds: the one that everyone else agreed on, that everything was fine, and it even made you feel good to pretend it; and the other reality that opens up regularly at nighttimeScreen Shot 2015-02-13 at 8.24.02 PM, steals your energy, makes you amnesic, and leaves you with wounds that any doctor might leave, except for one that makes you think it had to have been aliens. That’s why you go along with the pretense that everything’s fine, to take a breather from the intensity of the nighttime.

persephone n hades cropI feel like Persephone, innocent, stolen from the Mother Earth Goddess, and released in seasons, to recover, only to be drug back into Hell again.

All this mythology, of gods and aliens, opened my eyes to realms beyond – which disappeared also when interacting in the world where these things don’t happen, where people don’t even want to know that they happen, even to their own sister or mother; I understand; it’s far too scary to contemplate if you’re not forced to.

What do you do when you wake up, and this is your reality, this science fiction story in which the heroine faces strange demons in strange lands, and has had implants placed all over her body and is made unconscious regularly and has her energy depleted sometimes for days?

18mqxydmchb61jpgSome would say this is a human rights crime, illegal human experimentation. Others would say it’s spiritual warfare. Others alien warfare. Since I think the rogue state may very well be controlled by “aliens,” and everything has a spiritual component, I assume it is probably all three.  And I must fight it on all these levels.

I want to believe I was born into this life because I am strong enough to endure and grow from it, and hopefully will play a positive role in the resolution of this crime on Earth.

Thanks for reading and caring.